Write those belated thank-you notes

Dear Amy: My husband of five years died suddenly in 2004. He was 46; I was 43.

I had never experienced death and was emotionally unequipped for the grief that held me for the next few years.

There’s no way to describe that kind of sadness. I had to quit my job because I couldn’t work or do much of anything else, other than crawl up in a ball on my parents’ couch.

After my husband’s death, several of my friends and family members gave me monetary donations to offset the cost of the funeral, as well as lovely floral gifts, but I was too upset to write the thank-you cards.

Fortunately, I have a wonderful man in my life again and am very happy.

I’ve tried several times to write those thank-you notes, but every time I start, those feelings of sadness and devastation seem to take hold of me again.

Should I muster up the will to write the cards and hope that no one thinks that I am inconsiderate for waiting so long? Or should I let it go and pray that I was forgiven for such an oversight?

Hopeful in Chicago

Dear Hopeful: Untether this note-writing job from its sad moorings and you will be able to say what you need to say.

Don’t think of this outreach as a response to your tragedy as much as an opportunity to get in touch with your friends to tell them how you’re doing.

It’s never too late to tell people that you appreciate them.