‘Dancing With the Stars’ recap: NASCAR’s Michael Waltrip sputters out

It was as if Halloween was extended for another week in the glitterverse, as Dynamic Duos week on “Dancing With the Stars” had the seven remaining couples enacting famous pop culture duos.

Week 8 saw crime-fighting duos, star-crossed lovers, classic comedic pairs and biblical twosomes. There was also a dance-off between the six lowest-scoring couples for three extra points.

Head judge Len Goodman was chock-full of fun metaphors. Alfonso Ribeiro got stuck on a wire. Tom Bergeron swooped in on a zipline, while Erin Andrews revealed she wore Spanx. And we had to say goodbye to Season 19 favorite Michael Waltrip and his lovely partner Emma Slater.

No doubt this ouster was due to Michael and Emma’s criminally low Week 7 scores. And though it was crystal clear that the NASCAR driver was not a legitimate Mirrorball contender (and maybe on borrowed ballroom time), it was still sad to see him go. One can’t help but find his constant strive to be better endearing. And be charmed by the fact that he seemed to feel so charmed about being on this silly gem of a show.

“It was a chance to do something that was more emotional than physical [and] to know Emma’s heart and who she is as a person,” Waltrip said. “I’m a better person because of my tenure here.” At least Michael was able to end on a spangled high note with a lovely, winning blessedly loincloth-free Tarzan and Jane-inspired fox trot. “I like that you run your own race and you run it with pride,” Carrie Ann had said. And Michael said it best up in the sky box, when he said, “Sometimes it’s messy … but I’m dancing with my heart…. One of these days I’m going to put it all together and it’s going to be fabulous.” Can’t wait.

Tommy Chong and Peta Murgatroyd were also in danger, “though not necessarily in the bottom two.”

Here’s how the other couples fared on Dynamic Duo night:

Janel Parrish and Val Chmerkovskiy found themselves at the top of the leaderboard and with dance-off immunity with their perfect scoring contemporary routine, inspired by Romeo and Juliet. And kudos to the producers for not playing up the star-crossed showmance between Janel and Val and letting the dance speak for itself instead (well, all except for Janel’s inability to do a push-up). And starting from the opening moments, with Janel waiting in emotional anticipation and baby-faced(!) Val as Romeo sprinting to her with all the hope of youth, the whole contemporary routine was a flowing, pretty iambic pentameter come to life. “Extremely ambitious yet gorgeous and glorious in every possible way,” Bruno declared. “The epitome of what dance is about,” Carrie Ann said. “I knew you were a good dancer, but tonight you showed me that you’re a great dancer,” Len proclaimed. The routine left Julianne “breathless.… When you dance like that, there was nobody else in the room.” Janel declared this was her favorite dance, “such an amazing way to express emotion.” “Maybe you should shave every week,” Erin “get over here” Andrews suggested to Val. “I’m just saying.” Total: 40 out of 40.

Love love loved Alfonso Ribeiro and Witney Carson’s cha cha tribute to old school buddies Batman and Robin. Not only did the comic book twosome inspire the dynamic dancing duo to don masks and capes and do good around our fair city, but their routine had pop and color and great fun punch even though their “masks” looked more like hipster glasses. And despite the fact that Alfonso got stuck up on the zipline during camera blocking on Sunday (“I’m just hanging out, don’t worry about me). The show nabbed a great soundtrack to Prince’s awesome “Trust” from Tim Burton’s 1989 movie. And Alfonso and Witney danced the bejesus out of that routine. “Every time you come out you are pure entertainment,” Julianne said. “Alfonso rocks Gotham City!” Bruno declared, before pronouncing Witney “the hottest Robin” he’d ever seen. “Super tight, super in sync, super staccato, super smooth, supa smart,” Carrie Ann exclaimed. Alfonso and Witney received only a 38 but got a three-point boost for smoking Lea and Artem in the jive dance-off. Total: 41.

Bethany Mota and Derek Hough channeled the ‘50s sitcom characters Lucy and Ricky Ricardo for their high-octane salsa. Bethany, despite being extremely young, was familiar with the comedic genius that is “I Love Lucy” because her mother used to watch it in the mornings. And the YouTube star got major points for her spot-on characterizations. “To go from last week high drama to this week high camp and making it both so convincing.… Your versatility exceeds all my expectations,” Bruno crowed. Carrie Ann loved how Bethany was “funky, sexy, animate” but pointed out one mistake. “Hotter than a bull’s bum in June … you’re sizzling out there,” Len said. Julianne said Bethany’s journey this season was her favorite. “You’re killing it!” Bethany and Derek received a 37 for their salsa, but also won their dance-off cha cha against Sadie &; Mark by the slimmest of margins, for an extra three points. Total: 40.

Mark Ballas was zombie-crazy, microphone-throwing mad after what he felt were ghoulishly low scores for himself and Sadie Robertson last week. Mark really let Len have it during individual interviews, saying Len doesn’t like things that are out of the box, artistic or creative. But the pro dancer continued to push the envelope and do his thing in his and the “Duck Dynasty” star’s contemporary routine about Adam and Eve’s temptation and fall from the Garden of Eden, set to Alanis Morissette’s “Uninvited” and sung by guest vocalist BC Jean. The dance felt a bit jerky for my tastes, but the judges seemed to like them apples. Julianne loved seeing Sadie mature “beyond anything that we’ve seen.” Carrie Ann felt it was Sadie’s most “poignant, passionate” dance. “Mark, does this mean we’re not clubbing tonight?” Len asked. Total: 38.

Lea Thompson brought in an acting coach for the actress and Artem Chigvintsev’s Bonnie &; Clyde routine. And though Artem had claimed that “acting for me is like reading Chinese,” the pro dancer embraced his smooth criminal role and provided a worthy audition for “Bonnie &; Clyde: The Musical.” Lea, on the other hand, lacked a bit of bite. Which, to be honest, is a bit unbecoming for an actress. “You got to risk it to get the biscuit, and you’re a little bit safe in the dance,” Len declared. Bruno agreed, saying he missed the “reckless badass attitude.” Julianne said the choreographed felt “a little bit dated.” Carrie Ann loved the confidence, but told Lea she had to really dig in and “dance into the ground.” Lea, on the other hand, “felt like I was crazy wild out there.” Total: 32.

Tommy Chong and Peta Murgatroyd channeled Johnny Cash and June Carter for their “Ring of Fire” paso doble. Which was apt, as Tommy had met Johnny at the 1988 Oscars and they had similar upbringings. And the “Up in Smoke” star said that just as June pulled Johnny off his path of destruction, so also does Peta pull Tommy from the ballroom brink week after week. Unfortunately, “You were a beat behind for pretty much most of the dance,” Carrie Ann sadly. “You’re like a hot dog,” Len said. “Tasty, but you’re never sure about the content.” Julianne appreciated that Tommy brings “something new and authentic” to each dance and looks good in black. Bruno called it more of “a mild breeze” than a paso doble firestorm. Turned out Tommy was hoofing it with a calf injury suffered during dress rehearsal: “I can’t do my favorite painkillers.” Tommy and Peta received a 26 for their paso, and the father of attendee Rae Dawn Chong also battled through the calf injury like a boss to win the rumba dance-off against Michael and Emma for three points. Total: 29.

What do you think, ballroom fans? Sad to see Michael Waltrip go? Were you also a little bit disappointed that Lea suggested Tommy as a potential dance-off competitor? Are contemporary routines automatically scored higher? Who would you rather go clubbing with: Mark or Len?