Be Joel Stein: We have a winner!

Writer Sam Apple’s submission on circumcision comes out on top.

After three weeks of voting for your favorite Joel Stein wannabe (and Stein worrying about his job), we have a winner -- and it isn't Stein! Congratulations to Sam Apple, whose submission "America's next top mohel" came out on top of the Be Joel Stein contest. Read the submissions by the runners-up, Stein's Op-Ed column in today's paper and a transcript of Stein's live chat about the contest.

Elmo is an evildoer
The self-obsessed Sesame Street Muppet is destroying all that is holy on children's TV.
By Joel Stein

Toddler trauma
Drive yourself crazy with preschool.
By Suzanne Robertson

My can can't
When your toilet has had enough of your crap, what do you do?
By Jason Rohan

The D.C. Madam explains it all for you
Her frozen assets generate no heat.
By George Waters