These heartfelt messages left for California’s war dead remind us about the true reason behind Memorial Day
On this Memorial Day, the Los Angeles Times pays tribute to the California service members who have died in the wars in Afghanistan and Iraq by publishing a selection of comments posted over the last year by those who knew and loved them. Hundreds more can be read on The Times' database, California's War Dead.
These memories speak of friendship and loss in a simple and heartfelt way — and remind us of the great sacrifices made in service to this country.
More than 6,800 members of the American military have died in the conflicts in Iraq and Afghanistan since 2001. Among them are 755 native Californians and an additional 495 men and women who were assigned to bases in this state.
I heard the terror coming from the other side of the mic that your unit got hit.
— SrA Wilkerson
The comms in my truck went down and I had to go to the motor pool to get a new truck.... as I was setting up the comms for the new one, I heard the call. I heard the terror coming from the other side of the mic that your unit got hit.
We hurried to the gate to lock and load to come help. We brought the hemmet. Minutes seemed to take for ever. I was no longer scared for myself, but was worried about you and the others in your unit.
As we pulled up they were loading you in the medivac. You took off and that was the first and last time I saw you. I walked down to your truck. Sat there in silence. Trying to imagine what was in your head at the time it went off.
Your passing gave me my first taste of what war was. I pray each night that you are safe in heaven. 9 years later and you and the other we lost while we were there still goes through my head.
But to let you know, because of you we manned that place 24/7. Potentially saving many more lives. Your sacrifice did not go unnoticed.
I hope your family can see this so they will know that you made a huge difference.
— SrA Wilkerson, Dragon 1-2, Gunner on May 27, 2016
Christopher D. Young, 20, of San Pedro, was killed March 2, 2007, when a roadside bomb exploded near his vehicle in Safwan, Iraq, near the Kuwaiti border.
Bless you, your family, and our nation.
— Stevan Rich
Tomorrow is the anniversary of that tragic day and I'll come by Rose Hills to make sure you have flowers and a flag. You were one of the people that made my service with the 426th so rewarding and memorable. Bless you, your family, and our nation.
— Stevan Rich, LTC, USA (Ret.) on May 25, 2016
Blue C. Rowe, 33, of Whittier was killed May 26, 2009, when a suicide bomber in an explosives-rigged car rammed into his convoy in eastern Afghanistan.
Papa there's not one day when I don't go visit you.
— Jennifer
Papa there's not one day when I don't go visit you. We miss u so much Kayla is getting so big know we miss u so much are hero We love you
— Jennifer on May 5, 2016
Carlos Arellan0 Pandura, 22 of Rosemead was killed Jan. 20. 2006, when a suicide bomber blew up a car in Haqlaniya, northwest of Baghdad.
I often think about him and the sacrifice he made for his country.
— Michelle Fuller
I met Patrick when I used to wait on him at Applebee's in Tracy. He was always so polite and sweet. Always had a wonderful smile on his face. I was so upset when I read about his death. I still have the newspaper article saved, some 14 years later. I often think about him and the sacrifice he made for his country. What a terrible price to pay. I'm so sorry his family has to live without him. Just doesn't seem fair.
— Michelle Fuller on April 29, 2016
Military officials initially informed his family that Patrick R. McCaffrey Sr. of Petaluma had been killed by insurgents on June 22, 2004. They later determined he and another soldier, Andre Tyson of Riverside, were killed by purported Iraqi allies on patrol with them.
This time of the year is so hard.
— Scott Patrick
This time of the year is so hard. We gave each other a nod as we passed. Same road not more then 20 seconds apart. I never knew you personally but that day will be with me forever.
— Scott Patrick on March 26, 2016
Glenn J. Watkins, 42, of Carlsbad was killed April 5, 2005, in Baghdad when a vehicle-borne improvised explosive device detonated near his military vehicle.
Six years later, I'm still missing you like crazy.
— Brother
Six years later, I'm still missing you like crazy. Hope heavens cozy, and lots of ducks to shoot at. You're my hero. Keep it classy bro. I will never forget that final wave as you drove out our driveway. That final hug, the final "I love you buddy" I never thought it'd be the last time.
— Brother on Feb. 22, 2016
Tyler A. Roads, 20, of Burney died July 10 while on patrol in Helmand province, Afghanistan.
I knew he was destined for greatness.
— Norma Barrios
I had the privilege to have known Alex for many years growing up and I knew he was destined for greatness. It saddened me to find out that my friend had left us too soon but I know he touched many people's lives and he will always be remembered as a selfless brave man by all of us. Thank you my friend for your service and sacrifice you did to keep us all safe here at home.
— Norma Barrios on Jan. 22, 2016
Alejandro Ayala, 26, of Riverside died Nov. 18, 2007, in a vehicle accident in Kuwait.
It's not his fault we didn't have time to make a snowman.
— Davina
I still remember me and dad out side playing in the snow I asked him if we could make a snow man but he said couldn't at that time but he also promised that we could make a snow man together one day. He died before we could though but I know it's not his fault we didn't have time to make a snow man.
— Davina on Jan. 16, 2016
Rafael Martinez Jr., 36, of Spring Valley was killed in combat Oct. 14, 2010 in Darreh-ye Bum, Afghanistan.
Just know you are not forgotten and missed everyday.
— Danielle
You came to me in my dreams last night and you were happy. It has been a long time since I seen your happy face and smile and hear your laughter. But I know that you are at peace, looking over the loved ones in your life. Just know you are not forgotten and missed everyday. Especially your smile, friend.
— Danielle on Jan. 15, 2016
Jhanner A. Tello, 29, of Los Angeles died Dec. 10, 2009, in Baghdad of injuries suffered in a noncombat-related incident.
I learned that life is too precious to take for granted. Many of us appreciate your ultimate sacrifice Edgar.
— Alexander Batungbakal
...time flies, but memories last forever. Today, I was thinking about my past years and you came into my mind old friend. I still remember when we first met, playing basketball during recess and lunchtime at Stephen White Middle School and continued to do so during our Narbonne High School days, class of 98!!!! I still remember how you would like to joke around, especially in Physics class and would always call me by my last name. Time went on and we went our separate ways in college. It was a sad moment in many people's lives when I found out about your passing (from Jamie, BEAST!!), especially in your funeral. From then on, I learned that life is to precious to take for granted. Many of us appreciate your ultimate sacrifice Edgar. Your sudden passing influenced us in many ways and it opened my eyes to always strive more in life. Thank you for the fond memories pare!!
— Alexander Batungbakal on Jan. 3, 2016
Edgar P. Daclan Jr., 24, of Torrance died Sept. 10, 2004, when an explosive detonated while his patrol was responding to indirect fire in Balad, Iraq.
Do you know I love you? Those were some of the last words I said to him.
— Stacy
Do you know I Love you? Those were some of the last words I said to him. His answer is what I hold close as I learn the difficult lesson of living without him. "Yes, yes, I do, Stacy". " Do you know how much? ", "Yes, I Do" At the time there where no more words that needed to be said, although I can think of a thousand more now. Thank You, you have always been my hero, you mean the absolute world to me, I don't know how to live without you, Ten years have gone by and all I can hope is that I will some how make you proud of me and my girls. Cheyenne is now and always will be, alive in our hearts. We will never forget the hero that gave his ALL, to not only us, his beloved family, but to his country and her people because he truly believed in what America stands for, freedom and justice.I just wanted to thank you for the kind words and to ask that you remember this remarkable man as this Christmas marks ten years for our family. Love and Blessings
— Stacy on Dec. 16, 2015
Cheyenne C. Willey, 36, of Fremont died Dec. 23, 2005, when a roadside bomb exploded near his unit’s Humvee in Baghdad.
Just finished watching 7th Heaven dedicated to you and all those who serve out there.
— Ricky
Just finished watching 7th Heaven dedicated to you and all those who serve out there. Thank you for your service. Thank you Teresa for sharing your story with all of us and for your great example. May our Heavenly Father be with all those who serve and especially with their families. Let's all do something good to another person - today and always, to honor those who fight for our countries to be free of war and keep the peace.
— Ricky on Nov. 30, 2015
Dwight J. Morgan, 24, of Mendocino was killed Jan. 19, 2002, in a crash of a CH-53E Super Stallion helicopter in the snowy mountains near Kabul while on a resupply mission.
I miss you humor, your smile, and you.
— Leslie Frison
Cousin I miss you dearly, throwing me over your shoulder, tickling me until I turned red. I miss you humor, your smile, and you. I love you big cousin. You're the best!
— Leslie Frison on Nov. 11, 2015
Marcus A. Tynes, 19, of Moreno Valley, was killed Nov. 22, 2009, when a roadside bomb exploded near his convoy vehicle in southwest Afghanistan's Kandahar province, on the Pakistani border.
He always tried to make people laugh.
— Elizabeth Salvi
Me & Curtis been best friends since we were kids. He was always there for his family & his friends. He always tried to make people laugh. The 2 loves of his life is his beautiful daughter Mariana & his wife Aida. He called me right before he got hurt in Iraq made me promise if anything happened to him i would always be there for his daughter & wife, of course i always kept that promise. He loved life to the fullest such a happy person, i miss him so much. he was like a brother me, broke my heart loosing him the day before my birthday. miss you brother. I think of u often.
— Elizabeth Salvi on Oct. 10, 2015
Curtis R. Spivey, 25, of Chula Vista died April 2, 2007, seven months after being paralyzed in a roadside explosion south of Baghdad.
I didn't want to let go, but I knew you would be miserable if I didn't. So I did.
— Mom
Aaahhh, my little Ubu. My son. I watched you grow from a boy into a man. So many days I spent with your teachers as they told me what a class clown you were, and how distracting you were. You jumping off the couch onto the coffee table, with high karate kicks to Power Rangers. One of my fondest memories of you was when you were in 4th grade, we were trick or treating. I was holding your hand (like I had always done for years). You looked up at me and said "Mom? Can I walk ahead of you this time? Y'know, my friends and all." I didn't want to let go, but I knew you would be miserable if I didn't. So I did.
Just one more day to hold your hand would be heaven. I feel you in my heart, and all around me. I thank you for all you have taught me. I believe I am a great mother... because of you.
I love you.
— Mom, Dj Hill, on Sept. 16, 2015
Kevin J. Hilaman, 28, of Albany died June 26, 2011, of injuries suffered when insurgents attacked his unit in eastern Kunar province, Afghanistan, on the Pakistani border.
I remember every day at school he always had a hug waiting for me. I would run into his arms and he would swing me around.
— Randi Katich
I remember every day at school he always had a hug waiting for me. I would run into his arms and he would swing me around. He was the best person I could have ever gotten to know. I love him and always will. I miss him every day.
— Randi Katich on Sept. 14, 2015
Anthony E. Butterfield, 19, of Clovis died July 29, 2006, while conducting combat operations in Anbar province, west of Baghdad.
I will never forget the moment you died. It was the same moment I lost my innocence.
— Joe
I will never forget the moment you died. It was the same moment I lost my innocence. In that moment it all became too real. It has not been the same since.
— Joe on August 10, 2015
Merideth L. Howard, 52, of Alameda died Sept. 8, 2006, when a car bomb exploded near her armored Humvee in Kabul, Afghanistan.
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