THE GLUTTON

To make a happy hour truly happy, the Glutton wants (from most to least important) hearty, inexpensive bar food; strong drinks and no postproduction industry bores, muscled-out health freaks, homeless people or bros in baseball caps. It’s a lot to ask, especially on the Westside.

And yet, nobody needs happy hour more than Westsiders: Soul-crushing traffic means commutes shouldn’t even begin until after 8 p.m.

(Those who opposed Westside expansion of the Metro should be forced to spend evening rush hour serving mini Kobe burgers to harried drivers on Santa Monica Boulevard).

When the Glutton ends up marooned on the Westside in the early evening, she enjoys killing an hour or three in West Hollywood’s Cha Cha Cha [(323) 848-7700] hoovering down delicious jerk chicken pizza (only $6!) and (because alliteration rarely equates with appetizing cuisine) avoiding their goat cheese and guava quesadilla.

If the Glutton gets stuck farther west, she pops into CHAYA Venice [(310) 396-1179] for $5 happy hour snacks like albacore sashimi salad, spicy tuna tartare served on flaky, tostada-like crisps and potato miso soup.

All of this she washes down with a litchi martini, the de rigueur libation of Asian-inspired restaurants on Venice’s Main Street.

-- theguide @latimes.com