And Arnold could open for Hannah Montana

Goofy ideas have begun surfacing to erase California’s $8-billion budget deficit. One blogger suggests letting corporate sponsors rename the Capitol and build skyboxes in the legislative chambers. Meanwhile, lawmakers are trumpeting such bizarre concepts as “spending cutbacks” and “higher taxes.” But there’s no need for such drastic measures. Here’s a handy seven-part program that could generate enough revenue to easily cover the shortfall.

Medical Marijuana Bake Sale: Modeled after church and school bake sales, this annual statewide fundraising event could haul in an estimated $250 million by selling “special” homemade brownies.

The Indian Gaming Transportation Improvement Act of 2008: Under this measure, Caltrans would close all freeway exits and roads leading to Indian casinos -- unless the tribes pay a small highway maintenance fee of, say, $2 billion a year.

The Shawshank Redemption (a.k.a. the DreamWorks Nightmare): In recognition of entertainment mogul David Geffen’s pioneering efforts to block public access to the beach near his Malibu mansion, California announces plans to build a state prison on the shoreline abutting his property. Alternative sites would be considered only if Geffen paid a $1-billion processing fee. For an additional billion, the California Coastal Commission would officially change the name of the Pacific Ocean to the Geffen Sea.

Paparazzi Tax: Instead of trying to prevent photographers from stalking celebrities, the state would embrace the trend by licensing paparazzi and forcing them to use debit-card cameras that deduct a small fee from media bank accounts for each shutter click. Estimated annual revenue: $150 million.

The Ponzi Principle: Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger mails a “Deficit Reduction Chain Letter” to 10 other states, asking each to send $100 million to California’s general fund. The letter would warn recipients that bad luck has befallen states that broke past chains. Estimated annual revenue: $1 billion.

The Celebrity Blooper Bill: Under the California Public Stupidity Act of 2008, any celebrity, including politicians, caught saying or doing something idiotic would automatically forfeit 10% of his or her total assets. Think Britney Spears driving with her baby son on her lap, Antonio Villaraigosa sleeping with a Telemundo reporter, Mel Gibson’s DUI tirade and Lindsay Lohan’s Marilyn Monroe photo shoot. Ka-ching! Estimated annual revenue: $600 million. At the very least.

Sell San Diego: With its world-class zoo, pleasant weather and fully functional military bases, this seaside metropolis would make a perfect playground for a bored tycoon or aspiring dictator. Starting bid on EBay: $2 billion.