Suspended Keith Olbermann is irreplaceable on ‘Countdown’ -- or *is* he?


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Keith Olbermann, the host of MSNBC’s ‘Countdown,’ has been suspended indefinitely after reportedly breaking company policy by donating to a few political candidates without getting an OK in advance. Though news anchor Thomas Roberts is taking his place Friday night, we’re sure that in many hearts and minds, Olby is pretty much irreplaceable.

(Hey, it was hard enough deciding on Roberts -- turns out first pick Chris Hayes also made political donations without asking the boss first. Of course, the frequent ‘Countdown’ guest actually works for a magazine, so maybe he was unaware of MSNBC’s rules in advance.)


We’d like to count down a few celebrity replacements, to be used in case of emergency -- for example, if Olbermann were to lose his job after putting his money where his mouth is:

10. Larry King: Sure, he chose to leave his own show after 25 years, but everyone has second thoughts about retirement. Time with the wife and kids is often overrated.

9. Ryan Seacrest: When you already have 137 jobs, what’s a little nightly TV show? Heck, it’s only cable news -- as if anyone’s watching. Plus the ‘American Idol’ host has already shown he can work magic with raw cable-TV-host material.

8. Heidi Montag: She didn’t get picked up to take Megan Fox‘s ‘Transformers’ spot, so she probably has the time. And she and hubby Spencer Pratt will do almost anything for money, and right now they seem to need some. Has she tweeted any interest yet?

7. Bristol Palin: Perhaps admitting you didn’t vote would actually be a plus in this situation -- and she’s not very likely to be perceived as biased to the left, if MSNBC is sensitive to that sort of thing. Plus the fans voting for her to stay on ‘Dancing With the Stars’ might tune in just to show their loyal support. Ratings coup!

6. Levi Johnston: If the ‘mayor of Wasilla’ thing doesn’t work out, he’s just that much closer to getting his GED, right? Plus there is no residency requirement at MSNBC, and he’s familiar with chatting on live TV. 5. Charlie Sheen: The ‘Two and a Half Men’ star certainly has the temperament to be a nighttime cable news host, though we’re not sure his salary needs could be met.


4. Sandra Bullock: With her hit-it/quit-it/hit-it-again presence in the Gulf restoration PSA produced by Women of the Storm, she proved she’s hypersensitive to perceptions of conflict of interest.

3. Mel Gibson: We hear he’s having a hard time finding a job and keeping it. Because many folks have decided he’s definitely the worst person in the world, that ‘takes one to know one’ line on his resume could come in handy.

2. The Count: The ‘Sesame Street’ star could step right into the job. The dude can count, vampires are hot, and he’s already podcasting. Plus almost everyone loves ‘Sesame Street.’

1. Betty White: If there’s not a Facebook page suggesting this already, we’re shocked.

-- Christie D’Zurilla