‘Tori & Dean’ session harps on sex -- TMI

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Barf. After a very pleasant lunch, Oxygen held a panel session for the fourth season of ‘Tori & Dean: Home Sweet Hollywood,’ which premieres on May 26. We soon regretted having eaten.

Oxygen showed a clip of what’s to come, mainly Tori Spelling and her husband, Dean McDermott, juggling two children, dogs, a new book for her, a movie for him, a new jewelry line for her and sex fantasies for him.

In the clip, McDermott mentions ‘the sex we used to have.’ And we’re off!

The first question: Would you care to elaborate on the sex you used to have?

McDermott: Oh geez, how do I keep this above the table? I happen to be a Scorpio.

Awkward silence. Then:

Spelling: He’s a man. I’m a woman. I think we have a lot of sex and he thinks it’s never enough.

McDermott: She’s the most beautiful girl in the world and has the hottest body --
I’d be lying if i didn’t want to have sex with her six times a day...I was toasting that the sex was down from six times a day to three and a half.

The conversation now turns to Spelling’s bestselling memoir and return to ‘90210.’ McDermott is not asked a question but:

McDermott: And we have sex and she pretends she’s Donna Martin.

OK!

More questions about the challenges of balancing everything, including two children younger than age 2.

Spelling: It’s hard to find that balance because, on the one hand, I really do want to be a hands-on, full-time mom. But another part of me loves business, creating. I love entertaining. Doing it all and making everyone else happy and myself happy too.

McDermott: I’ve kept her pregnant. Did I mention I’m a Scorpio?

Now the question we were all waiting for. Have you ever had a moment when you’re all dolled up for a red carpet event and one of your kids lets out a juicy burp?

Spelling ignored that part and instead said: I don’t like to go to as many red carpet events...But one night I got ready and Liam was eating and he turned -- he was going through his daddy phase -- and said, ‘NO!’ He realized I had red lips and my hair was all done and I was leaving.

McDermott: Oh, I just thought he didn’t like the outfit. You can’t go out in those shoes and dress!

Somehow the discussion turned to poo -- we confess: we spaced out -- and we learned even more about Spelling’s husband.

McDermott: There’s a lot of poo in our lives with the dogs, the babies, and … me.

-- Maria Elena Fernandez