‘Pretty Little Liars’ recap: A isn’t for Amateur

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Well, so much for that theory. Just when it felt like the walls were finally closing in on A—who might perhaps maybe have been Noel Kahn, or at least in cahoots with him—this week’s episode threw everyone for a loop once again. Apparently A had a change of heart from her usual anti-posse meddling and decided to meddle on behalf of the crew, though not before some of her nastiest work to date. And we got a glimpse of Spencer’s best Veronica Mars imitation, not to mention another clue at who might have actually killed Alison.

But first thing’s first: After the lasagna box cash got stolen from Hanna’s Mom’s “unauthorized bank loan” last week, A left a trail of crumbs for Hanna to reclaim part of the money. A pretty literal trail of crumbs, in fact: back to Lucky Leon’s cupcakes where Hanna picked up six enormous cupcakes, each adorned with a pig’s face. And what does A want? Why, for Hanna to relive her horrible struggle with an eating disorder, of course. She has to eat all of them while jocks at an adjacent table chuckle and “oink” at her, after which A taunts “You know how to get rid of it.” Plus, we learn in a flashback that Hanna had a gentle nudge into bulimia thanks to her very own frenemy: Alison. Low blow, A. But at least it earns Hanna some Benjamins back, out of the paper towel dispenser, no less. Is there any surface that A won’t write weird messages on? One assumes that it’s only a matter of time before skywriting is involved.

Over at Rosewood high, Noel Kahn, frustrated with his failure at pushing Ezra into changing his grade on a paper, leaks to Emily’s brother that tomorrow he’ll reveal his inappropriate student-teacher making out tendencies to the principal. Aria and Ezra have a candle-lit slumber party, full of sighs and worries. But just as Ezra is doing his slow-motion walk to tender his resignation, a trusty deputy finds the answers to three midterm exams in none other than Noel’s locker, courtesy of A, who reminds Aria that “A is for Alison, not for amateur.” Could it be that A’s actually switching sides?
I’m inclined to say no. All of A’s power derives from the girls not being able to own up to their secrets. She seems to have left Emily mostly alone now that she’s come out and A has no more leverage. Not that Emily’s path has been gilded since then—witness Maya being sent to gospel camp after Emily’s mom ratted her out for her (extremely modest) weed stash—but If Aria and Ezra were out in the open, A wouldn’t be able to use it to her advantage. And where would the fun in that be?

Not to worry, though—secrets are in more than adequate supply. Melissa revealed to Spencer that she’s hoping to get pregnant like, now, and the news was circulating less than 12 hours later. Spencer also confirms that Ian and Alison were at Hilton Head the same weekend. And then, the clincher—A sends the girls the whole video of Alison on the night of her death. The camera turns to reveal none other than Spencer’s new brother-in-law. And, oh yeah, someone in the shadows lurking outside the house, who the girls follow in hot pursuit just as the credits rolled. Cliffhanger! Let’s hope next week it pays off.


--Margaret Eby