Late Night: Jon Stewart calls Newt Gingrich a ‘pollutant’

This article was originally on a blog post platform and may be missing photos, graphics or links. See About archive blog posts.

As Jon Stewart observed on ‘The Daily Show’ Thursday night, the day was a roller coaster for Republican presidential candidate Newt Gingrich.

It began on an upbeat note, as Texas Gov. Rick Perry announced he was dropping out of the race and throwing his support behind Gingrich. But, as Stewart joked, ‘Gingrich barely had time to have a victory affair,’ because only a few minutes later came a ‘bombshell.’ In an interview with ABC’s ‘Nightline,’ Gingrich’s second wife, Marianne Gingrich, claimed that the former House Speaker had asked her for an open marriage.


Accidentally on purpose confusing Gingrich’s second ex-wife, Marianne, with his first ex-wife, Jackie, Stewart said, ‘It’s not surprising that Newt’s ex-wife is not a fan of his. It’s long been reported that Newt discussed his first divorce while she was recovering from cancer surgery.’

Realizing the error of his ways, Stewart concluded, ‘I can’t imagine Marianne has as big a beef with the former speaker as his first wife.’ Cut to a clip from ‘The View,’ in which ABC News correspondent Brian Ross explained how Gingrich asked Marianne for a divorce shortly after she was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis.

‘First wife, cancer? Second wife, multiple sclerosis? Can Newt Gingrich be reclassified as a pollutant? A carcinogen?’ Stewart wondered. ‘The guy’s like the dioxin of husbands.’

As he feigned nausea over the idea of Gingrich’s swinging lifestyle, Stewart joked, ‘I think I’m going to be sick, and then Newt will leave me.’

He then turned to correspondent John Oliver for some expert analysis, asking if the revelations over Gingrich’s messy personal life might put a stop to his momentum in South Carolina.

Oliver insisted that Gingrich’s audacity only made him more appealing to the Republican electorate. ‘Gingrich can make the case to voters: Don’t look at what I did. Look at the skill it took me to do it,’ he argued. ‘You really think the Chinese want to go toe-to-toe on debt negotiations with a guy who tried to get his recently-diagnosed-with-multiple-sclerosis wife to swing? ... Their culture is based on shame, and Newt Gingrich has none.’

Oliver described Gingrich as an ‘emotionally and physically repugnant man’ who, despite his resemblance to Dwight Schrute of ‘The Office,’ has a romantic track record that ‘Warren Beatty would find daunting.’

He also proposed a new slogan for Gingrich’s campaign: ‘Open your legs, America.’

Let’s all say it together now: Ewww.

The Daily Show with Jon Stewart
Get More: Daily Show Full Episodes,Political Humor & Satire Blog,The Daily Show on Facebook

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c
Indecision 2012 - The Freaker of the Spouse - Newt Gingrich’s Negotiation Skills
Daily Show Full Episodes Political Humor & Satire Blog The Daily Show on Facebook


Late Night: Jon Stewart says SOPA would ‘break the Internet’

Ex-wife: Newt Gingrich wanted ‘open marriage’

Late Night: Stephen Colbert drops super PAC to run for president

— Meredith Blake