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No sprint to ‘Dancing’ finish for Maurice Greene

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For having not a lot of personality (not as much as, say, Warren Sapp) and with an obvious inability to swivel his hips much (he was a world-class sprinter, hip-swiveling wasn’t required), it wasn’t much of a surprise to see Maurice Greene get eliminated from ‘Dancing with the Stars’ on Tuesday night.

That leaves Warren Sapp (Super Bowl-winning Warren Sapp, the DWTS promos keep saying, as if it was Sapp all by himself who won the Super Bowl) as the only athlete left as DWTS moves into the semifinal round.

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Sapp should be able to outlast the 18-year-old Cody Linley, who is famous for something (okay, he’s on ‘Hannah Montana’ but even DWTS promo writers can’t attribute all the success of ‘Hannah Montana’ to Linley because, well, that would make Miley Cyrus and her dad, Billy Ray, very unhappy as opposed to, say, any of the members of the Tampa Bay Buccaneers who watched Sapp win that Super Bowl title).

But it’s hard to imagine Sapp hauling his 300-pound body on into the finals where it seems as if the contest will come down to whether Brooke Burke (she has the best pro dancing partner in Derek Hough, no contest) can get the young male votes (hah, as if there is such a thing) to beat former boy band singer Lance Bass, who is rapidly improving his dancing, and his slightly racy and slightly punkish dance partner Lacey Schwimmer.

So who will Oakland Raiders fans be voting for next week? Hah, as if there were such a thing.

If you’re counting at home, that’s two former Olympic champions gone from DWTS. Beach volleyball star Misty May-Treanor left early when she ruptured her Achilles’ heel.

Tough sport, this dancing stuff.

-- Diane Pucin

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