<strong><em><u>Ted Green</strong></em></u>: The new Clipper Ripper lets ‘em have it

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You can tell me he doesn’t know if the ball is pumped or stuffed. You can muck up the point of the exercise here with actual historical data, like those three measly playoff appearances in 27 pitiful years. You can even remind me that at one of his Fourth of July beach soirees in Malibu, he once excitedly introduced me to a famous celebrity hairstylist friend of his as ‘Vital’ Sassoon, a vital error in the man’s actual first name, long after having made a fortune in hair products.

But I’m still impressed with owner Donald Sterling making a beeline for the Clippers’ locker room to tell the guys he isn’t going to take their lousy effort lying down.

Even if his team already has.

In his early years as the big Clipper cheese, emis truth, Donald T. wasn’t quite sure where the home team locker room was. So finding it without the help of an usher is an improvement right there.

And since it is his team, stuffed or otherwise, the new Clipper Ripper has every right to dress down his sad-sack bunch of low achievers, asking all of the following questions:

• How can a team with Baron Davis, Marcus Camby, Zach Randolph, Al Thornton and one of the NBA’s top rookies in Eric Gordon have the league’s third-worst record with only 15 wins? (Please don’t tell me Chris Kaman hurt his foot, I’ll laugh and bust my hernia stitches).
• How and why did Baron Davis go from being an elite point guard to now playing more like Gray Davis or Geena Davis?
• If Davis and General Manager-Coach Mike Dunleavy are not on the same page or even reading from the same book, doesn’t one or the other have to go?
• And of the 3 billion games the Clippers have lost this season because of some player injury, how many times did one of Donald’s guys kinda hide in the training room, deciding that playing through a little pain or discomfort wasn’t worth the trouble with the team well down the road to oblivion? In other words, I’m not seeing too many Kobes in Clipperland when it comes to pain threshold.

But oh me, oh my, even if his basketball stewardship is the Hindenburg in high-tops, Donald was right as rain to rip his guys. The last time I saw that many dogs in one place, a Shih Tzu was winning best in show at Westminster.

Why, the Donald’s rant was so effective, so right on, the message hit home so directly, the Clippers went out in their very next outing and took a 23-point thumping from the Memphis Grizzlies. At home! To Memphis, a team with their own hound dogs and flea problems. A Grizzly bunch that had won a grand total of three road games all year.

So, yes, as pep talks go, the T man’s tirade probably will not be mentioned in the same breath with George Gipp’s.

In its own way, though, it does have its place, the first time the Donald went in there and let his guys have it. Telling them to win one for the Clipper.

-- Ted Green

Ted Green is a former sportswriter for the L.A. Times. He currently is senior sports producer for KTLA Prime News, which carries Clippers games on local TV.

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