Helping Burn Victims to Heal Emotional Scars

“When it comes to the Burn Recovery Group,” Betty Mock says, “burn survivors have two options. They can sit home and pity themselves. Or they can get out, come to the group and make their lives worthwhile again.”

Mock knows a great deal about being severely burned, and about the group. At 3, while playing with matches at home in Ohio, she accidentally ignited a gasoline can and suffered burns over 86% of her body. Now 22, Mock has been attending the Burn Recovery Group--which a few years ago might have been called a “rap group”--off and on for the nearly six years since her family moved to Santa Ana.

In recent months, she has been serving as moderator of the group, which is sponsored by the Orange County Burn Assn., a nonprofit organization situated in UCI Medical Center in Orange. The group, which meets monthly on the hospital’s Burn Floor, is open to all burn survivors and their friends and families. Although the turnout fluctuates from month to month--there might be fewer than 10 people or more than 25--the meetings are also typically attended by occupational therapists, social workers, Burn Unit nurses and, on occasion, Dr. Bruce Achauer, the plastic surgeon who directs the Burn Unit.

The group operates a bit differently each session, trying to remain flexible enough to address any issues or needs that might come up. Pat Darnell, executive director of the Burn Assn., says it “prefers to have an unstructured situation. . . . We deal with issues such as ‘phantom pain,’ the difficulty of going into public with severe disfigurements, relationships and depression.”

Early in one group session this summer, Cheryl Bess (the 16-year-old who was blinded and severely burned last October when a man poured sulfuric acid on her) was responding to complaints and questions about pain from Jeff Beatty (who two weeks earlier had burned his legs in a motorcycle accident and, still confined to his hospital bed, was wheeled into the meeting):

“It’s going to hurt for a while. But they say ‘pain is gain,’ so if it hurts, you’re getting better,” she advised. “And then you’ll notice a change and it won’t hurt as much. Like Ken and Bob (hosts of KABC-Radio’s morning show) say ‘EGBOK--everything’s gonna be OK.’ ”

Cheryl’s mother, Norma, then turned to Jeff and suggested he try reading, which she said won’t eliminate the pain but might distract him from it.

“I think the group provides support and information, so parents know what (their burned children) are going through and the burn survivors become aware of what their parents and immediate family are going through,” Mock said during an interview.

Rosemary Tanis appreciated this point. Tanis, of Huntington Beach, has cared for Vincent (Vinnie) Valencia, 7, since shortly after he was burned at 13 months over 85% of his body. Vinnie’s mother, who was seriously ill with cancer at the time of the accident, died when he was 3.

“I feel it’s a good support group,” said Tanis, 65. “For example, there was a time I needed some help when Vinnie was complaining at school that his hands hurt, and he never finished his work.” Tanis went on to explain that, initially, she thought Vinnie was simply trying to avoid doing his schoolwork. But at the next group meeting, she noticed that the members with burned hands were constantly rubbing and working their hands. And one veteran burn survivor mentioned that the pain in his hands still hadn’t disappeared.

Group members suggested that Tanis give Vinnie a round pencil (versus the kind with edges) and put foam from a hair curler around the pencil, making it easier to hold.

“You can bet the next day I had a round pencil with foam around it for Vinnie,” Tanis recalled. “So that was just one thing about the group that was constructive as far as I was concerned. I think a lot of it is--it might not all be constructive to Vinnie, but it probably is to someone else.”

Group discussion turned to the topic of reconstructive surgery. Many of the burn survivors undergo this type of operation to rebuild--or in some cases, build--ears, noses, eyelids and mouths.

Rosemary Tanis announced that the process to rebuild Vinnie’s ear had finally been completed. “It took seven surgeries,” she said, “but it was worth it.”

Cheryl chimed in, “I’m going into the hospital again for surgery. They’re going to give me a new nose, rebuild some eyelids and make my mouth a little wider. . . . Can I touch Vinnie’s new ear?”

Vinnie, who had been scooting back and forth between the refreshment table and Tanis’ chair, paused briefly at her side. He then walked over to Cheryl and allowed her to feel the ear.

“When Cheryl asked to touch Vinnie’s ear and he went over so she could, I thought that was very positive for her, and positive for Vinnie,” Tanis said later in an interview. “If you help somebody else, it makes you feel good. I think giving of yourself really helps.”

This idea is considered crucial by others who attend the group. “Being at these meetings gives you a strong sense of helping someone else,” Mock said. “You feel good because you’re giving. And whenever you’re giving to someone else, you become too busy to think, ‘Woe is me.’ And that’s important because being burned is certainly no picnic.”

Which is why, back in 1978, Dr. Achauer, Susie Martinez (nursing manager of the Burn Unit) and some burn survivors started the Burn Recovery Group: to answer all types of questions, to reduce fears and insecurities--to accelerate the internal healing while the skin grafts, reconstructive surgeries and other treatments worked on the external.

It is the only such group in Orange County, according to Burn Assn. Director Pat Darnell, who added that two similar groups meet in the Los Angeles area: at Brotman Medical Center in Culver City and Rancho Los Amigos Medical Center in Downey. Darnell said that although the Burn Recovery Group consists only of burn survivors drawn from UCI Medical Center’s Burn Unit, it is open to all area burn survivors--and their friends and families--who would like to attend.

“Our goal is for each member of the group to feel secure enough in this setting to express any concerns they have about their burn injury or related problems,” Darnell said.

That objective appears to have been fulfilled, judging by the no-holds-barred yet remarkably safe atmosphere that characterizes the sessions. Questions or comments that in most other situations might be considered inappropriate--or downright offensive--become acceptable.

“Is there a reason you don’t lose weight? If you lose some weight, you might feel better.”

“I know that, but I’m lazy. . . .”

The group’s anything-goes approach notwithstanding, this exchange between a heavyset burn survivor and the mother of another burn survivor raised a few eyebrows. And an uncharacteristic tension rose in the room.

Someone pierced it by changing the subject to the benefits of exercise. But by the mother’s direct question a few other members picked up on this burn survivor’s particularly poor self-image and low self-esteem: When she uttered yet another self-deprecating comment, another burn survivor asked, “Why do you always put yourself down?”

And a few moments later, the mother was back at the issue of the burn survivor’s self-image, asking her, “When you look at yourself in the mirror, do you notice you have a pretty face and pretty blue eyes?”

“I thought I looked plump. . . .”

“You’re emphasizing the negative,” someone else interjected. “She’s asking you about the positive.”

The mother repeated: “You have a pretty face. Do you think so?”

The burn survivor: “Not really. To tell you the truth, I don’t like looking at myself in the mirror. . . .”

Although this kind of exchange was more direct and pointed than most, it illustrates the way the group members try to help solve or soothe each other’s particular problems and anxieties, even if doing so isn’t always pleasant.

“I don’t want to sound mushy or anything,” Mock said, “but I think the main point of the whole group is love and acceptance. No matter how badly you’re burned, everyone in the group accepts you.”

About the value of the group to burn survivors--many of whom undergo two or three dozen painful operations in the course of their recovery--burn survivor Tom Handlan said, “I think the group is as important as the surgeries because it helps the people mend their minds, their emotions. And the mending will determine how they’ll live the rest of their lives.”

The group seemed to have encouraged mending in Handlan himself, who has been attending for three of the four years since the van accident in which he suffered burns over 95% of his body. Last spring, Handlan, 24, received his associate of arts degree at Cypress College, and in the fall he will enter Cal State Fullerton, where he plans a double major in psychology and philosophy. His regular exercise regimen includes stretching, bicycling and swimming. And he’s starting to play competitive soccer, as he did in high school. When discussing his burns and recovery, his manner is matter-of-fact but suggests a steely resolve: He wants to get on with his life. “I’m pretty aggressive about getting better,” he said.

When the group’s discussion swung back to the reconstructive surgery, Handlan joked that the worst thing about getting his new ear lobe is that people keep encouraging him to get an earring.

In fact, humor, usually in the form of good-natured jabs, is a big part of the Burn Recovery Group discussions.

Someone asked Mock about a forthcoming trip. Mock, looking toward Achauer (who performs the reconstructive surgery on the burn survivors), answered, “Yeah, I’m going to Seattle--to see my new surgeon.”

Achauer, playing right along, responded, “Oh? Where should I send your records?”

A while later, Cheryl Bess asked, “Dr. Achauer, how long did it take you to get through medical school--I want to know before I get there. I’ve wanted to be an obstetrician since I was 5. . . .”

Mock: “I’d like to be a brain surgeon.”

Bess: “Not on my brain.”

“People ask me,” Mock said, “why I’m always clowning around and joking about my burns. And I reply, ‘If you don’t laugh about it, if you took everything about this seriously, you wouldn’t survive . ‘ I really believe that humor is the best medicine.”

Handlan agreed that humor plays a significant role in the dynamics of the group and in the overall healing of its members. “Yeah, the humor has always been a way of covering up fear and dealing with pain--to get over the tough spots. As we say in the group, ‘If you don’t laugh, you’ll cry.’ ”

A moment later, Mock turned serious in summing up the group. “The Burn Recovery Group,” she said evenly, “is a support system that says, ‘You’re somebody important to us. We don’t want you to liedown and die, we don’t want you to be a wimp. We want you to be strong, we want you to go through the pain and show people that they can’t get the best of you.’ ”