Obviously, USC Offense Is Predictable

You’ve heard of instant replay, but how about instant preplay? That’s what you get from WTBS announcers Mel Proctor and Paul Hornung, who not only call ‘em as they see ‘em, but before they see ‘em.

With the score tied, 10-10, and USC on the Washington 13-yard line in the fourth quarter last Saturday, the dialogue went like this as the Trojans broke the huddle:

Hornung: “Ken Henry goes over to the right side, where he’s against Demouy Williams. They like to go to him in this situation.”

Proctor: “He’s got a 36-inch vertical jump, and they like to throw to him in the corner of the end zone on a fade pattern.”

With that, Rodney Peete faded back and lofted one to Henry, who caught it behind Williams in the right corner of the end zone for a touchdown.

As Lester Hayes would say, it was academic.

Would-you-believe-it dept.: Of the 28 head coaches in the National Football League, four have yet to get their college degrees, and three of them are undefeated--Mike Ditka (Chicago), Dan Reeves (Denver) and Dan Henning (Atlanta). However, the fourth, Gene Stallings, is still looking for his first win at St. Louis.

Note: Ditka’s failure to graduate is hardly a reflection on the University of Pittsburgh, since two other NFL head coaches, Marty Schottenheimer of Cleveland and Joe Walton of the New York Jets, both got their degrees from Pitt.

Trivia Time: What school had the most players taken in the first round of the 1986 NFL draft? (Answer below.)

For the Record: Mark A. Snyder of Northridge, correcting a recent trivia item, points out that Walter Payton, not George Blanda, is the all-time high scorer for the Chicago Bears.

Add Payton: Writes Charles Siebert in an Esquire story on the running back: “Payton has even patented a way to advance his cause after a play is over. Almost as a reflex action, after each carry he puts the ball about a foot ahead of his marked forward progress, gets up, and walks to the huddle. And each time the refs come to move the ball back, but Payton figures he might gain a few inches in the transaction, and over the course of 11 years perhaps a hundred yards or so.”

Says ex-Bear great Dick Butkus: “It’s a little thing maybe, but you’re trying to tackle this guy all game, and you knock him down, and all of a sudden he’s moving the ball up. It’s like he’s saying, ‘Yeah, you stopped me, but I’m kind of still going.’ ”

Dept. of Irony: From Todd Phipers of the Denver Post: “Detroit’s Darrell Evans, who had a $25,000 attendance bonus in his contract this year, fell 563 fans short as the Tigers closed out their home season last week. If he had known how close he was, he could have purchased 563 tickets for less than $2,500, given them away and pocketed the bonus.”

From Tony Kornheiser of the Washington Post: “I’m sure you’ll all want to join me in wishing Mary Lou Retton the best of luck in her new career as a very short, very rich, battery-operated, supercharged, teen-age Texas co-ed. I trust she’ll continue studying nutritional science now that she knows what the big boys eat.”

Trivia Answer: Iowa, with three. They were quarterback Chuck Long (Detroit), running back Ronnie Harmon (Buffalo) and tackle Mike Haight (New York Jets).

Quotebook

St. Louis quarterback Neil Lomax, on his Monday Night Football performance: “I threw the ball well, especially to Dallas.”