‘I learn a lot from my clients.’

Tony Botticelli went to beauty school to meet girls and was “screwing off” and shampooing hair when a motivational seminar got him on a career track. From styling wigs (“It’s still working with people, they just drop off their hair”) to running his shop for 16 years in the La Jolla neighborhood of Bird Rock, the 44-year-old Botticelli has seen his profession evolve from a “shampoo and set” for women to creating “shapes and designs” that match men’s and women’s “personalities and life styles.” Loyal clients, ages 3 to 88, fill his Botticelli’s for Hair salon and teach him as much about life as about snipping and styling hair. He met his second wife “in the chair” (her appearance was striking but it was the Dale Carnegie tapes in her car that won him). He is active in community fund-raisers. Though he has certificates displaying his training in London and New York, it is a framed proclamation commending his community work from former Mayor Roger Hedgecock that he displays with pride in his salon.

Botticelli was interviewed by Times staff writer Nancy Reed and photographed by Peter McCurdy.

I used to do wigs--it was a different time. This was 1966 to about ’68. We didn’t have the services we have today. Years ago, a perm would kink up hair and that was it. If somebody couldn’t wear that style they would wear a wig. Then, synthetic wigs came in. At that time, they were giving away the damn things in gas stations. Remember the silverware they gave away? They used to give wigs away! I thought to myself, what I am doing?

At one point, I had zippo and was going to get out of the business when I heard about a seminar in motivation and success by the hypnotist Dr. Michael Dean. I had to borrow the $40 for me to go, and it turned my life around.

It taught me goal setting, achieving and communicating, and in no time everything started coming together.

I used to hate my name--I grew up with a “bowl of chili” and the other names. People were trying to pronounce it, and for a while it was real intimidating. I thought, well, should I put that in the front of my salon? And as it turned out, it was a great name. Especially in an area where people knew who Botticelli (the Renaissance painter) was.

I learn a lot from my clients. I have a way of making my clients talk.

Sometimes, you kind of get yourself in too deep and you have to back your way out--they really start to unload. I am not a psychologist. If they want to really get heavy, I’ll up my rates to $135 an hour.

There is jealousy there. When I got married, a lot of the women were hurt. We weren’t romantically involved, but they think they are special. I work in this room over here, and sometimes I have to shut the door so they don’t feel that people are moving in on our time.

I like giving clients a new look. Men like really attractive women, but husbands don’t like their wives to look that attractive. They are a little bit intimidated by it. She gets too much attention. I had one client who had to leave her husband for two days because he hated her new look so bad.

If they come back, we tone it down a little bit--and show them that it is only temporary.

Clients have helped me to be more successful. I have learned how to invest, for instance, and how to put back into the community.

A friend took me to Juvenile Hall to style hair--I did that for almost nine years in the Las Colinas facility. It showed me the other side of the coin. I got to know what young adults and teen-agers were going through.

It makes you more aware. You learn that it isn’t just you, and you cut out the “I, I, me, me” stuff.

That opened personal doors for me about “putting back.” I started having thank-you parties the night before Thanksgiving at the salon. It was called the Turkey Trot. It grew to over 600 people, so we started doing something for underprivileged kids. It’s now called A Taste of Bird Rock and the whole community kicks in. We raised $7,000 last year. It makes me feel good.