CAMPAIGN ’88 : 10-Gallon Hat in Ring?

One thing definitely missing from the 1988 presidential campaign is a sense of humor.

But Tom (Cuz) Graham is about to take care of that.

Graham, a singing cowboy from Mineola, Tex., will soon ship out his latest 45-rpm record, “Cuz for President.” If it is as well received as his last release--which he said has been especially strong on college campuses--Graham may just announce his candidacy for the White House.

Graham, 45, is a maker of country novelty records.

On “The Last Liberal Song,” Graham’s current record, he sings about the end of liberalism:

“The next to last liberal lives out in L.A./ And I went out to see him just the other day/ I said, ‘Let’s start a commune, man,’ but he told me no way/ ‘Cause even the communists are capitalists today.”

“Cuz for President” goes like this:

“If you nominate me, folks, I won’t run/ If I’m elected I won’t serve one day/ I’ll make the White House a Holiday Inn/ And make Congress the morgue it’s always been.”

In a telephone interview, Graham said he started making records after his cattle ranch went broke.

“I think I’m gonna have to run for President myself,” Graham said. “What this country needs is a busted farmer. Who else knows about dealing with debts the size of what this country faces? Farmers are also moochers, you know, and we need a moocher in the White House ‘cause we’re gonna have to start mooching money back from the Japanese.”