‘Stockman and Watt, Diversions You Forgot’--Journalists Spoof 8 Reagan Years

A chorus of Washington journalists thanked President Reagan “for the memories” Saturday night--the memories “of Stockman and Jim Watt, the Iran-Contra plot, of Ollie and Bill Casey, the diversions you forgot.”

“Oh, thank you, so much,” sang members of the Gridiron Club in a musical spoof that also took aim at Democratic and Republican presidential candidates, Administration officials and television evangelists.

Organizers allowed no live broadcast of the event by radio or television, but they provided a text of the songs in advance, giving these details of the evening:

The “Thanks for the Memories” tune lampooned former Budget Director David A. Stockman, the late CIA Director William J. Casey, ex-Interior Secretary James G. Watt and former White House aide Oliver L. North.

Second Only to Roosevelt

Reagan was “honored” for attending the show and dinner for the eighth year in a row. He is the 17th consecutive President to attend the event and second only to Franklin D. Roosevelt for the number of dinners attended.

The club also “thanked” First Lady Nancy Reagan for “banishing (former Secretary of State) Al Haig and bloodying up (former staff chief) Don Regan’s nose,” according to a text of the songs provided in advance by the organization.

The 103-year-old journalists’ club also presented a spoof to the tune of “To All the Girls I’ve Loved Before” by show members playing former Colorado Sen. Gary Hart and television evangelist Jim Bakker.

“Bakker” lamented: “To all the girls who heard me pray and stayed on for another day, I’ve lost a TV show.” And “Hart” joined in with: “To all the girls I’ve loved before, who traveled through my alley door, I’m glad you came along, but something sure went wrong.”

Responding to the tune were show members playing the parts of “Donna Rice” and “Jessica Hahn,” who sang: “Our men are on the ropes and they say we’re the dopes.”

Off-the-Record Speech

Reagan was to give a traditional off-the-record speech at the dinner, expected to be attended by 700 people.

Gridiron President Carl T. Rowan, of the Chicago Sun-Times, bade farewell to the Reagans, noting that they had “set a marvelous record of coming to the Gridiron dinner. . . . They’ve brought us a lot of laughter and given us a lot of reasons to make fun.”

A skit member playing Vice President George Bush sang to the tune of Michael Jackson’s “Bad.” Among the lyrics: “They know by now that I’m no wimp. . . . I’m a pit bull from Kennebunkport (Me.) and I’m ready to bite again.”

Meanwhile, rival “Bob Dole” asked in song: “GOP--Look at me, why couldn’t you find me?”

A satirical version of “America, the Beautiful” made fun of Democratic candidate Richard A. Gephardt’s focus on trade as a campaign issue: “O beautiful for Subaru, and Datsun, now Nissan,” the song went. “America, America, God shed his grace on these: Thy tiny cars and sushi bars and all things Japanese.”

‘Hush, Nervous Nellies’

A skit member playing the part of Democratic candidate Jesse Jackson did a rendition of George Gershwin’s “Summertime,” with the lyrics: “White folks jumpin’ . . . ‘cause the bidding is high. . . . So hush, nervous nellies, don’t you cry.”

And a bogus Democrat “Michael Dukakis” chanted that he was “a technocrat with a heart of gold. I’m not a fluke. Shake my money tree.”

To the tune of “Love Is Sweeping the Country,” which is from the 1930s Broadway show “Of Thee I Sing” that itself parodied presidential politics, the chorus looked over the field of Democratic candidates and asked: “Can any of these clowns score?” They concluded: “No more surprises from plagiarizers, no voters weeping now, they’re just sleeping now.”