“Men aren’t interested in you if you have little boys.”

Lisa Heckman divorced after 10 years of marriage. Two weeks ago she remarried and now sees a happy future with a new family. Lisa and her husband, Michael, live in Agoura Hills, and they have seven sons. When my husband moved out of the house, at first I went into the hibernation period. I didn’t pick up the mail out of the mailbox. It would pile up for days. I would go to work, but it was like I was sending the android to work. I couldn’t sleep at night. I was grieving because something died.

I bought Diet Cherry Cola by the case, and ate Ritz crackers. I lived on those for three or four months because nothing tasted good to me.

All of a sudden I became this immaculate housekeeper. I was up real late one night about 12:30 and I was waxing the kitchen floor for the second time that week, and I just broke down and sat there sobbing. I thought: “I can’t do this anymore. How am I gonna raise three boys by myself?”

You think it’s never going to end.

When I started dating again, I met a sheriff’s deputy at Zuma Beach. We started dating and I made more out of it than I should have. When you’re that lonesome you want to be in love. When that ended I was really broken up over it. I thought, “I’m not going to see anybody else; I’m through with men. I’m going to raise my boys, just be a working mom, and be a martyr.” I didn’t see anybody for about three months.

I was playing the piano in church one day, and this man was staring at me. I had noticed him because he was so tall. And I thought, “Who’s that man?”

He came up to me outside of church afterward and I had my three boys in a cloud around me, and he had his four boys. He laughed, and said, “Hi, I’m Michael, with the four boys.” And I said, “Well, I’m Lisa with the three boys.”

I got home that night, and there was a message on my answering machine that said, “Hi, I’m Michael, the tall man you met with the four boys. Would you like to go to the singles Bible study on Thursday night?”

I started immediately thinking that I’m not going to get in over my head again, I’m just going to go out and have a nice time.

So we went out that Thursday night, and I had a nice time with him. I remember looking up at Michael and thinking, “He is so tall, he makes me feel short. This is a wonderful feeling, I really like it.” In the class pictures in grammar school I was always in the back with the boys.

The next day I came in to work and here’s two dozen red roses sitting on my desk. The card said, “Thinking about you. May I see you tonight? Michael.”

Michael showed up an hour later at my work. I got such a kick out of it because it was so different than what I’d experienced before. Here was someone who was obviously nuts about me, and I didn’t know how to handle it.

When we got home that night, what impressed me the most about Michael was what he did when we drove in the driveway. I said: “Well, good night, I had a really nice time. I need to go pick up my boys at the baby-sitter’s around the corner.” And he said, “Let me help you.”

I about fell out of my tree, because men aren’t interested in you if you have the little boys. I mean the kids are like excess baggage. Michael went over to Betty’s house with me, and he slung Ryan over one shoulder and Trevor over the other, and I carried Kyle. And he helped me put them to bed. I kept thinking, “Gosh, that he would do this.” I could tell he missed his boys tremendously, because they live quite a distance away.

I always knew that I’d get remarried and something good would happen to me, but never in my wildest dreams did I think that something this good would happen to me.

We were horseback riding a few weeks ago in Santa Barbara. We rented seven horses, and we each put the little ones on our laps, and Michael was at the beginning on the trail, and I was at the end. And I remember looking at all of them and thinking, “My God, this man has brought such joy into my life.”