ORANGE : Santa Debate Finds Profs Poles Apart

Santa Claus works at the North Pole to avoid taxes and regulations, delivers his toys in the dark of night to elude Customs agents and is a master of the free enterprise system, a college professor jokingly asserted Wednesday.

His management style “would make the Japanese blush with envy,” declared Don Booth, professor of economics at Chapman College during a mock college debate on the topic, “Santa Claus: Entrepreneurial Genius or Capitalistic Spy?”

On the Santa-as-spy side: “Haven’t you ever wondered how Santa flies around without setting off Russian radar?” queried Robert Slayton, a history professor at the college. In fact, he alleged, St. Nick’s “Stealth Sled” is little more than a spy plane financed by the U.S. Department of Defense.

What’s more, Slayton argued, the image of Santa as a kind and gentle philanthropist is bunk.

The jolly man in the red suit exploits his workers and discriminates against children with different religious or ethnic backgrounds, Slayton told about 60 students who attended the debate.

Through extensive research, Slayton said, he discovered that Santa operates a sweatshop type of organization, where workers toil many hours for scant wages and minimal benefits until they are very old with long white beards. “The working conditions are terrible!” he shouted.

Slayton argued that by giving his loot to some children and not others, Santa discriminates against those with different beliefs and cultures.

“Santa has corrupted Christmas, made it the symbol of class warfare,” he said. “Moral values have been replaced by materialism and the slogan has changed from ‘Good will to all,’ to ‘What did you get?’ ”

But Booth was unswayed by his colleague’s presentation. Santa “should be revered as a creative, rugged individual” and a role model for business executives worldwide, he said.

Santa’s entrepreneurial success can be traced to his management style, Booth explained. “Working for Santa is such a pleasure that most people do not ask for any salary other than the joy they bring to others.”