Addressing Problems in Kindergarten : Behavior: Studies show emotional problems can start early. A volunteer program reaches out to children identified as having special needs.

They are small problems now, the kinds that often get chalked up to being “just a stage.”

But to an increasing number of counselors, teachers and psychologists, some common behavioral characteristics in kindergarten-age children--including aggression, tearfulness or reluctance to play with other children--can be warning signals of problems to come.

Many recent studies have looked at reasons children drop out of school, “and one of the things they found is that a lot of problems could be traced back to kindergarten,” said Alison McAlpine, director of the Los Angeles Unified School District’s Kindergarten Intervention Program (KIP).

“The thinking until now has been that kids would eventually outgrow certain adjustment difficulties,” McAlpine said. “Now we’re seeing that it isn’t necessarily so.”

Eight years ago KIP was begun in a handful of elementary schools to reach out to children identified by teachers as needing special attention, but who have not yet reached a point where counseling has become necessary. Under the program, volunteers with the district’s school mental health office go into classrooms and work with at-risk students in small groups or one-on-one. The goal, McAlpine said, has been to help children with adjustment problems feel good about themselves, and thus their ability to succeed in school.

“When you have 33 children in your class, even if you gave 120% of yourself, it still wouldn’t be enough to reach the children who need that extra bit of attention,” said Tobi Rosen, a kindergarten teacher at Erwin Street School in Van Nuys for the last 20 years who was one of the first teachers in the San Fernando Valley to implement the program. “The children get that extra bit of confidence from the volunteers, and the feeling that someone really cares.”

Although only a few schools took advantage of the program a few years ago, McAlpine said, 44 elementary schools in the Valley now have volunteers who work in kindergarten classrooms. Since receiving a federal grant two years ago, McAlpine said, the KIP program, which is affiliated with a similar program at UCLA, is being expanded into first-grade classrooms.

“We’ve been able to follow some of the kids into about fifth grade, and there have been good results,” she said, adding that UCLA is doing follow-up studies to determine the program’s effectiveness. “Although it’s difficult to say now what would have happened if there had been no intervention, many of those children who are identified as being at-risk in kindergarten are doing well.”

KIP, which McAlpine said was modeled after a similar program in New York, has been praised by psychologists. Florence Bienenfeld, a former kindergarten and educational consultant in Pacific Palisades who holds a doctorate in marriage and family counseling, said, “It’s so good to see that schools are willing to put money into a preventive program like this, instead of into a mop-up program for dropouts after the fact. Prevention really is the key for these kids.”

The program, however, actually costs schools nothing and is an inexpensive solution for the district, McAlpine said, since it relies solely on trained volunteers. Many college students and senior citizens are KIP volunteers.

“We had one senior citizen volunteer who was in a wheelchair,” Rosen said. “He loved the children, but they also really loved him.”

Children, though, aren’t the only ones who receive assistance from the program. Parenting workshops, which are held two times at the onset at each elementary school involved with the program, give parents the chance to talk about problems they are encountering, as well as to receive advice from the school mental health staff. Interpreters are provided for Spanish-speaking parents.

At El Oro Way Elementary School in Granada Hills, 16 mothers recently pulled their chairs into a circle in the school’s auditorium to talk about what many describe as daily battles with their kids. Topics range from aggressive behavior and sibling rivalry, to getting children into bed at night or up in the morning.

For most parents, the mere mention of aggression hit a nerve. Each had a story to tell about angry or hostile behavior and how they had dealt with it.

Susan Moreno, the mother of four children and also an assistant third-grade teacher, told the group that she was hospitalized two years ago for several days after undergoing emergency surgery. Frightened and unable to understand why his mother had left so suddenly, Moreno’s son, now 6, began taking out his feelings of anger on his baby sister.

“He was blaming the baby for my health problems,” Moreno said. “I kept telling him I didn’t like the behavior with his sister and that I wouldn’t tolerate it, but it wasn’t working.”

She began to see a positive effect, Moreno told the group, after she set aside a specific amount of “special time” each day with her son. During the 10 or 15 minutes they spent together after dinner, she said, “He knew that he didn’t need to compete at all for my attention and that it was our time together. It took him two years, but I think he knows now that I’m not going away.”

Other members of the group shared similar experiences with aggressive behavior in their children, as well as the benefits of giving children--especially ones with siblings--individualized attention each day.

McAlpine, who lead the group along with two other staff members from KIP, pointed out another positive aspect.

“As every mother knows, there are some times when you simply are too busy to stop everything and give your full attention to what a child is saying,” she said. “Instead of saying, ‘Not now,’ though, you can say, ‘I want to hear this, but I’m very busy right now. Can you hang onto it and share it with me at our special time?’ ”

But, as most parents at the meeting attested, competition with siblings isn’t the only source of aggression with young children. Several parents voiced their concerns over the effects of too much television and the difficulties they encountered when they attempted to control what shows their children watched.

“My son has been punching a lot, and so he’s no longer allowed to watch ‘America’s Most Wanted’ or other violent shows,” one mother said. “I don’t know whether that will help, though.”

In typical support-group fashion, several mothers offered other suggestions for helping the boy deal with pent-up anger or frustration.

“Maybe you should try putting a punching bag in the garage,” said another mother. “Let him get it all out.”

Terry Fischette, on-site coordinator with KIP, said she gave her son karate lessons when he began acting aggressively. Instead of becoming more violent, she said, the aggression actually stopped. “I asked him why he stopped, and he said, ‘Because now I know I don’t have to fight. I know that I could.’ It helped him channel energy.”

The parenting workshops, though, are meant to be more than just an emotional swap meet. With the help of school mental health professionals who interject advice frequently during the sessions, parents learn about the developmental characteristics of children and ways to promote positive social adjustments.

McAlpine and other staff members encourage parents to use behavior modification techniques with their children, instead of putting themselves in what they say often amounts to exhausting, repetitive power struggles.

“Sometimes we get stuck by thinking, ‘By God, I’m going to hang in there and keep punishing him when the undesirable behavior comes up,’ ” McAlpine said to the mothers, when the issue of consistency arose. “If something isn’t working, try something else,” she advised.

One of the best ways to change unwanted behavior with young children is with a technique called charting, according to Bobbie Ozar, a kindergarten consultant with KIP who attended the meeting. Parents sit down with a child and define in clear terms what behavior they want to eliminate--whether it is “yelling” or “hitting your brother.” They then tell the child that, for each day the behavior stops, the child will receive a star on a chart.

At the end of one or two weeks--any longer, Ozar said, and the child loses interest--a reward is given to the child.

“Does that work with getting a kid to wake up in the morning?” one parent asked, eliciting immediate groans of familiarity from the group. “No matter what I do, it’s always, ‘Five more minutes.’ ”

Moreno said she had success trying a somewhat more creative approach than nagging. At the suggestion of a friend, Moreno said she went about her morning routine after her son insisted on “just another few minutes” in bed. When he finally woke up and realized how late he was for school, Moreno said she told him to keep his pajamas on all day and stay in bed.

“That was the last time he did it,” she said. “Now when I say to get up, he’s up.”

McAlpine said she applauds such creative approaches. She recalled one mother at another group who hadn’t been able to stop her young children from fighting in front of the television. After two warnings the mother sent her children into their rooms and then proceeded to sit on the couch and watch cartoons with the volume turned up high.

“She sat there and laughed and laughed for them to hear her, just as though she was having the greatest time,” McAlpine said. “Instead of just being sent to their rooms, they realized what they were missing out on because of their fighting.

“It’s that kind of approach that can do wonders to change behavior,” she said. “Parents just need to learn that they have more tools available to them than they may know.”