Tumultuous Love-Hate Affair Traps a Little Girl in the Middle

America’s Odd Couple are at it again.

Elizabeth Morgan and Eric Foretich were divorced in 1982, but they are linked together today by bonds stronger than their marriage ever was.

They are linked by their love for their daughter, Hilary, and their hatred for each other. It is anybody’s guess which bond is stronger.

In reality, though, these emotions are two sides of the same coin. In ugly custody fights, to deprive the other side of the child becomes as important as getting the child yourself.

That’s because the child is not only an object of your love, but a weapon with which to wound your opponent.

Morgan was given custody of Hilary and Foretich was given visitation rights. But Morgan refused to allow such visitation, saying Foretich sexually abused the child.

Foretich denied it and a court supported him, ordering Morgan to produce Hilary for visits. Morgan refused, hid the child and went to jail for 25 months. Only an act of Congress, hurriedly signed by George Bush--Morgan has many rich and powerful friends--got her out.

But Morgan still refused to produce the child. She said she would keep Hilary’s whereabouts a secret until Hilary was 18. Recently, however, Hilary was discovered living in New Zealand with Morgan’s parents.

While the case is dramatic, it is not unique. Custody battles with accusations of child abuse are not uncommon. As others have noted, such accusations are the “nuclear weapon” of child custody cases.

And it is a weapon that gets immediate attention and a lot of support for whoever raises it.

The difference in the Morgan-Foretich case is the wealth of the people involved--both are doctors and the case has already cost more than $2 million--and the media savvy of both sides.

Morgan and Foretich have given scores of interviews and have even debated on “Nightline.” They have their strategies worked out and their lines down pat, and each knows how to say vile things about the other and appear reasonable while doing so.

One sign of Morgan’s skill at media manipulation is how much support she has received for holding herself above the law.

This is a country where we like to believe that nobody, even the highest public official, is above the law. We have the Watergate scandal and the Iran-Contra mess to testify to that.

But Morgan defied a lawful order of a court and still became a hero to many. She said she had to do it to protect her child. But people who think they are above the law always have good excuses. Ollie North said he was trying to protect democracy itself.

(Ironically, Morgan’s lawyer, Stephen Sachs, is the same man who in 1968 prosecuted and sent to prison nine Roman Catholics, including two priests, who destroyed draft records in Catonsville, Md., as a matter of conscience. Sachs said at that time that nobody had the right “to take the law into their own hands.” He said he found such actions “offensive.” He does not, however, find Morgan’s actions offensive.)

The case is now lost in a blizzard of accusations. It has replaced the War Between the Trumps in the headlines. There are now even accusations about the grandfather who is taking care of Hilary in New Zealand. The lawyer appointed by the court in Washington to protect Hilary’s interests says the grandfather is “extremely unstable” and could be “a danger to Hilary’s best interests.”

And the grandfather did not help things when he made an ugly racial statement about the judge who sent his daughter to jail.

None of this can be good for Hilary. And a New Zealand court has pledged to do what is best for the child.

But who cares what the New Zealand court does? If Morgan is willing to defy a United States court because its ruling did not please her, what makes anyone think she will follow the ruling of a New Zealand court?

And who says two will not play this game? If Morgan can defy a court order and get public support, what is to stop Foretich from trying it?

That is the trouble with holding yourself above the law: The only boundary is your own conscience. And that can leave a very wide playing field.

The most optimistic thing you can now say about this whole sad affair is that children are wonderfully resilient. Other children have survived worse than this and we can hope that Hilary will not only endure, but prevail.

Personally, I wish Hilary could be taken from all her relatives and be given a new identity like the people in the federal Witness Protection Program. I’ll bet there are hundreds of couples across America who could raise this child better than anyone currently involved.

The parents, of course, would not like it.

Morgan would scream and holler and call names and go to the media.

Foretich would scream and holler and call names and go to the media.

So there may be another possibility. Maybe these two will reconcile.

After all, they have so much in common.