A ‘Simpsons’ Demographics Lesson

TV or not TV. . . .

BREAKDOWN: Eye-opening demographics disclose just how “The Simpsons” virtually tied “The Cosby Show” last week in their ratings matchup.

It’s only one week--but the Fox cartoon’s smashing season debut came about like this:

Fifty-six percent of kids 2-11 and more than 50% of youngsters 12-17 tuned in “The Simpsons.” What’s more, 50% of men 18-34 and 42% of men 18-49 also watched Bart Simpson and his animated family.

The figures for women fans of “The Simpsons” were slightly lower but still impressive--41% of females 18-34 and 36% of those 18-49 watched the show’s fall premiere.

Among folks 50 and older, there was almost no “Simpsons” audience: 8% of the men and 6% of the women.

“Cosby” was more consistent across the board, but it’s still more popular with women, kids and teens than with men.

“The Simpsons” actually tied “Cosby” in the key category of overall audience share--with each show attracting 29% of the nation’s viewers.

That figure probably stunned the fledgling Fox network as much as anybody.

“Cosby” barely edged out “The Simpsons” by one-tenth of a point in total household ratings. But even an NBC source expressed amazement at the tight competition because NBC has 208 stations and Fox has lined up only 133 thus far.

Despite the whopping “Simpsons” performance, Fox still finished third for the night--not only behind NBC, but also ABC as viewers 50 and older went solidly for a two-hour “Columbo” with Peter Falk.

MAESTRO: Leonard Bernstein, who died Sunday, gave TV some of its happiest moments.

His “Young People’s Concerts” on CBS in the 1950s and ‘60s were joyful excursions into musical learning. He seemed to be having more fun than anyone.

He also appeared on the great “Omnibus” series. And he remained a TV presence through the years on PBS.

It is certainly a sign of the times that there is no room for a series like the “Young People’s Concerts” on any commercial TV network today.

MOLLY: Blair Brown had said earlier this year that she would like to continue in “The Days and Nights of Molly Dodd,” which Lifetime cable picked up after NBC canceled it.

“It’s kind of a diary of a woman,” said the series star.

But after Lifetime last week disclosed the imminent end of “Molly,” a spokesman for the channel said:

“We felt it had run its course, creatively speaking. The show is not what it was.”

“Molly,” created by producer-writer Jay Tarses, has focused on a single, independent-minded career woman living in New York. When the most recent original episodes ended in a cliffhanger this year, she was pregnant.

And in its final 13 new episodes that begin in January, the father will be revealed.

The coming episodes will have “a lot of closures,” says the Lifetime spokesman. “The series will come to an end, come together nicely.”

Well, maybe. But the end of “Molly” is TV’s loss. It went its own quirky way and became something special. At least, however, Lifetime will have rerun rights to “Molly” through 1992.

AFTERMATH: KCET Channel 28 registered its most-watched day ever with its Sept. 30 rerun of the entire PBS documentary series “The Civil War.” In fact, the show’s original run, just days before, gave KCET the most-watched week in its history.

CLOUT: New acquisition Michael Tuck is the most authoritative anchor KCBS Channel 2 has had in years. His recent 11 p.m. teaming with Bree Walker improved and sharpened her performance considerably.

THE LADY VANISHES: If Susan Dey does indeed leave “L.A. Law” after this season, there’ll be a lot less reason to watch it.

BY GEORGE: Did you know that George Burns, whom we salute each week by using his “Say good night, Gracie” punch line, can be heard delivering it to Gracie each Saturday night when KNX Radio runs the old “Burns & Allen” series at 9:30? Don’t miss it. Holds up great. And it’s part of a classic radio hour: Reruns of “The Jack Benny Show” precede it at 9.

PROGRESS REPORT: Always liked the way Richard Beymer hung in there after his weak, early career portrayals in the films “West Side Story” and “Hemingway’s Adventures of a Young Man.” What a pleasure it is to see him now as a commanding actor in “Twin Peaks”--as unscrupulous mogul Benjamin Horne.

SICK, SICK, SICK: At least it was a gag--a terrific one--when the principals in the 1968 movie “The Producers” connived to put on an intentional flop called “Springtime for Hitler”--and cheat their backers. But now comes the report of a planned British sitcom about the home life of Adolf Hitler, his lover Eva Braun and their Jewish neighbors, titled “Heil Honey, I’m Home” and set in 1960s Hollywood. It’s the most repulsive show business notion in memory.

GAME PLAN: Look, if Oakland has Cincinnati in its hip pocket by 7 tonight in the first game of the World Series, no problem. Just flip over to superstation TBS at 7:05 and you can catch the ever-wondrous “American Graffiti.”

NIGHTWATCH: CBS’ new Charles Kuralt-Lesley Stahl series, “America Tonight,” isn’t doing badly in the ratings considering that it’s not cleared in a number of top markets. But CBS doesn’t seem to realize that Kuralt and not Stahl is the natural center of the show.

BEING THERE: Caught “To Have and Have Not” on KTLA Channel 5, and when Lauren Bacall and Walter Brennan truck on out of that nightclub, with Humphrey Bogart in tow--well, folks, that’s about as good as movie endings get.

Say good night, Gracie. . . .