Good Things Come in Threes : Parents of Triplets Share Their Experiences at Club

These women are in a class of their own. They have had to trade their cars for vans, almost always need additions to their homes and do things in multiples of three.

They’re mothers of triplets in South County who aptly call themselves TLC--Triplets Local Connection--when they meet every two months to swap stories and share experiences about raising children, in this case three of a kind.

The odds of having triplets are 9,300 to 1. And these parents will testify that they face equally tough odds in caring for their multiples. In fact, the worries begin at conception, according to one medical expert who has delivered more than a dozen triplets.

“Because there is a higher risk of prematurity with triplets, the moms worry,” said neonatologist Dr. Ragnar Amlie, director of nurseries at St. Joseph Hospital in Orange, where 21 sets of triplets--63 babies in all--have been born in the last eight years. “Then a lot of questions suddenly come to mind: How does a mother breast-feed three babies at the same time? Do they have special strollers for triplets? Are there stores that give discounts?”

Amlie said that half of those births were the result of women taking fertility drugs.

Sue Ogden, a San Clemente mother of triplets, said she founded TLC last November to provide answers, moral support and encouragement for parents. Ogden, 35, was able to contact the parents of 14 sets of infant-to-preschool-aged triplets in South County by monitoring birth announcements in a national triplets newsletter.

“I wanted to have a place where mothers could get together and talk about problems, fears and expectations,” Ogden said. “For the kids, it’s also beneficial, because although they are not given their true single identity, by meeting others they would know that they are not freaks and that there are people like them around.”

At the meetings, mothers sometimes talk about how they deal with changing as many as 270 diapers a week, handling three screaming infants at the same time and where they can find baby clothes--cheap.

The meetings are held in a room that the Ogden family added when they had daughters Ashly, Breana and Carlee more than three years ago. Almost immediately after arriving for the meeting Friday, seven sets of triplets and four siblings turned the room into a giant playpen as they tumbled around blowing bubbles, tossing toys and, sometimes, throwing tantrums. Mothers chased after babies, babies chased after other babies, and babies chased after mothers.

After the children got used to each other, the mothers left them in the custody of two visiting fathers and some grandparents and slipped into an adjacent living room for a quick chat.

All the mothers acknowledged that having triplets has crimped their budgets--and their lifestyles.

“We’ve had to cut back on a whole lot of things,” said Mission Viejo’s Ann Smith, who beat medical odds of 50,000 to 1 when she had identical female triplets.

“It’s embarrassing, but I have to look at their bellybuttons if I really want to be sure” which child is which, she said.

“We added another room, bought an eight-seater station wagon, and we don’t go out as much. And because they outgrow shoes so quickly, we prefer to buy canvas tennis shoes . . . no Reebok or L.A. Gear,” Smith said.

“Sales,” chimed in Rosalind Tenney of Rancho Santa Margarita, whose triplets celebrated their first birthday at Friday’s TLC meeting. “I hunt down all the sales. No more shopping sprees.”

Linda Nielsen, an Irvine mother of four, including female triplets, said she had to quit her job as a computer operator with a Santa Ana law firm. Since the arrival of the triplets, the Nielsens have moved from a three-bedroom townhouse to a four-bedroom house. Linda’s husband now works longer hours to support the family, but that hasn’t been the only thing to change.

“We have kept some of our close friends, but we’ve lost others,” Linda Nielsen said. “We don’t get out a lot, but now my husband and I have date night every Wednesday. That is when we take off from the kids for about an hour to go on long walks or to split a pasta dinner or something like that. It makes a big difference.”

Parents often talk about their pet peeves. Ogden said she doesn’t mind the attention she and the triplets receive when she takes them shopping. But almost all of the other mothers said they resent it.

Nielsen said she sometimes steals away to shop at night just to escape the constant questions. “I have actually been paced by people in other cars who want to ask something about my triplets,” she said. “If I ever go out with them, I have to psych myself up to answer the same question every few minutes.”

On Friday, the group was preparing to welcome its newest member as mothers signed a card to a San Clemente woman who is expecting triplets. Others talked about assisting a San Bernardino mother of eight who had triplets on New Year’s Day. The woman’s husband has been unemployed for the last three months.

Even though the tasks are sometimes burdensome, the mothers agreed that they wouldn’t trade the experience for anything. “It’s not triple the trouble,” Ogden said. “It’s triple the treat.”