Profits We Can’t Stomach
Things have been tense enough lately to give anybody a sour stomach.
But it may be of some comfort to know that at least one industry is benefiting from our indigestion: According to Packaged Facts Inc., a New York research firm, the antacid market grew 5% last year and is expected to grow another 50% by 1995, when sales will reach $1.1 billion.
Aside from distressing world events, the development most responsible for boosting sales of antacids will be the introduction of a relatively new remedy called H-2 blockers to the non-prescription market. Until then, H-2 blockers, which prevent digestive cells from secreting the acid that causes indigestion, are available only by prescription.
Bon appetit!
A Call to End All Calls
You don’t want to start preparing for the end of the world at the last minute. So, for $2 a minute, you can be ready by calling the 900-number Tribulation Hotline and listen to the advice of astrologer Farley Malorrus.
In a five-minute recorded message, Malorrus, who hosts a weekly radio show called “Astrological-Metaphysical Radio,” explains what the Bible says about The End and how events in the world fit into prophecy.
Included in the message is a Persian Gulf war update, a tip on how you can help the world environment and a suggested meditation to help “promote peace and harmony on Earth as well as health and prosperity for us as individuals,” says Malorrus’ press release.
Some Would Call It Bad News
The Jan. 18 issue of the San Francisco-based California Technology Stock Letter offered a colorful description of the initial stock market surge that followed the outbreak of hostilities in the Middle East:
“All the market needed was good news to explode to the upside,” the letter enthused. “It got great news. Saddam Hussein decided to turn the other cheek rather than fight back. And then turn the other cheek. And the other cheek. So far, it’s been like watching Buster Douglas fight Michael Jackson. You have to wonder what his original plan was when he got into the ring.”
