Nice Things Will Come to One Who Waits and Waits and Waits

In this case, the last shall be last. Of course, we’re speaking of Irrelevant Week, a 16-year-old spoof honoring the 336th and last player to be chosen in Sunday’s NFL draft.

The last guy, whoever he is, will be crowned Mr. Irrelevant of 1991 and flown to Newport Beach in late June for a week of good-humored fun that also raises money for local charities.

Last year, tight end Demetrius Davis of Nevada Reno discovered that being named Mr. Irrelevant was the highlight of his career. He was cut before last season by the Raiders.

The selection of this year’s honoree will be made by General Manager George Young of the New York Giants, who may need to study up on the relevancy of Irrelevant Week.

Its motto? “Irrelevant Week means doing something nice for someone for no reason.”

Draft data: This may be equally irrelevant, but in its preview of the NFL draft, Sport magazine predicts that former USC quarterback Todd Marinovich will go in the fourth round.

Trivia time: How many wives has George Foreman had?

Does Bo know? One possible repercussion of Bo Jackson’s hip injury is how it will affect the price of his sports cards. Jackson’s football rookie card from 1987 is unchanged from last month at $16, but his 1987 baseball rookie card has dropped 50 cents to $22.

“A lot of people think Bo’s cards will drop like a rock in the ocean on a bad day,” said T.J. Schwartz of Porky’s Sports Emporium in North Hollywood. But Schwartz doesn’t agree: “He’s still Bo.”

Mean Mr. Mustard: Oakland A’s outfielder Rickey Henderson had a minor disagreement with a fan who requested an autograph only to get the brush-off. Why? Could have been the T-shirt the fan was wearing. On the front, it read: “The Cost of Hot Dogs is Going Up.” Henderson’s picture was underneath.

Magnum K’d: Even though actor Tom Selleck struck out as a pinch-hitter in a Detroit Tiger-Cincinnati Red exhibition game, part of his research into a movie about baseball, the longtime “Magnum P.I.” star apparently looked the part.

Said Red catcher Jeff Reed: “He came up there with a big wad of chew in his mouth and he started spitting like a ballplayer.”

Memo of the week: From the Clippers to members of the media, in a cover sheet for a news release on the NBA playoffs: “Although we’re not involved in the playoffs this year . . . “

This year?

Add memos: Second place goes to the NFL, which in a news release listed NFL players who were outstanding baseball players, but failed to mention either Bo Jackson or Deion Sanders.

Borg update: When Bjorn Borg played a practice match Tuesday at Monte Carlo Country Club in Monaco, Monte Carlo Open tournament organizers decided to charge fans 50 francs, or about $9, to watch the former Swedish tennis star prepare for his comeback at 34. No one showed up.

Rose update: To what gambling depths did Pete Rose actually sink? According to John Steadman of the Baltimore Evening Sun, Rose bet on Canadian Football League games.

Trivia answer: Five.

Quotebook: Larry Holmes, 41, former heavyweight champion coming back from a 3 1/2-year retirement, after knocking out Tim (Doc) Anderson in the first round: “Like James Brown said, ‘I feel good.’ ”