Stuck on the Midway Between Doubt and Derring-Do

“Can I show you this? Come on, try it.”

“It’s easy. Anybody can win.”

“Let me show you how this works. It doesn’t cost you anything to watch.”

The voices come at you in a relentless, cacophonous rhythm. Everybody has something to offer to you (yes, that finger is pointing at you, inviting you to come on over). Come on over and play our game. If you play well, we have a wonderful prize awaiting. You’re a loser now, pal, but come on over and soon you’ll be a winner. And if you fail, don’t worry; for just another dollar or two, redemption awaits.

Welcome to the midway at the Orange County Fair.

Everybody loves a fair. Life is a carnival. And for every lost soul walking down the midway, there’s a pitchman at the ready.

I’m walking down the midway, elbow to elbow with the other weary travelers, kind of knowing where I’m going but still sort of aimless, and I see the guy pointing at me.

“Excuse me, do you want to see how this works?”

Of course, I’m curious to see how something works. Man has always wanted to be let in on the Great Secret. In this case, it’s a simple matter of throwing a ball into a bushel basket. It looks so easy. When Dave does it, it looks like anyone can do it. But when a nonbeliever tries it, the ball bounces out.

If people would just listen to him, Dave says, they could all win.

“People don’t listen,” he says. “I try to tell them the truth, and they don’t believe it. They’re too used to being lied to.”

Con men abound in this world, hiding behind pledges to turn losers into winners. Is everything out here on the level, I ask Dave.

“They have to be on the level,” Dave says. “They get watched real carefully.”

He wouldn’t lie to me, would he?

Now 31, Dave has been working the circuit for the last couple years in addition to other jobs he holds in Phoenix. He had a good year, but things are slower this year. He doesn’t want to say how much money he made last year. On this day, business is really slow, but it’s only midafternoon. The faithful usually don’t come out until after dark.

Even so, lots of people seem to be strolling by, but few are stopping. How do you lure people, I ask Dave.

“You’ve got to come up with something original,” he says. “You can’t use the same stuff over and over. They turn off to you.”

Are people listening these days?

“If people want to pay attention to you, they’re going to,” he says. “If they don’t want to, they don’t.”

What is it that entices people, I ask.

“The flash, the lights, the razzle-dazzle,” he says.

People think the life he leads is mysterious, but it involves a lot of hard work, he says. Lots of hours and sometimes the take isn’t that great. That’s when it really takes people who know what they’re doing: “When you’re open and things are going, then it’s showmanship,” he says.

Showmanship. That’s the ticket. How to lure those souls over to your booth when so many others along the midway have their arms out to them.

“Would someone watch this?” a young woman in a booth says, alluringly. Her specialty is showing how to use a loop to ensnare a bottle and make it stand up on end. Just like with Dave, it looks so easy.

A few wanna-be believers try their hand at the game. It proves more difficult than they thought. She smiles and exhorts them to try again. They say they’re short of money. She turns her attention to someone else.

But not to fear. That lost soul can seek redemption down the line.

Along the midway, everybody’s got a philosophy. While the young woman used charm, the guy in another booth appeals to one’s sense of self.

“Need a ballplayer here!” he cries.

Wanting to prove worthy, several answer the call.

I have enough money to play all the games, but they all seem too difficult. They all want me to perform tasks that I probably can’t perform. And I wonder, deep down, if they really are on the level. And they all want money to do it. There must be some other way to win the big prize.

You wonder how many others on the midway have the same conflicts.

No matter. For as long as the conflicts exist, as long as there are souls on the midway, the pitchmen’s exhortations will echo into the night . . .

“Can I show you this? Come on, try it.”

“It’s easy. Anybody can win.”

“Let me show you how this works. It doesn’t cost you anything to watch.”

Dana Parsons’ column appears Wednesday, Friday and Sunday. Readers may reach Parsons by writing to him at The Times Orange County Edition, 1375 Sunflower Ave., Costa Mesa, Calif. 92626, or calling (714) 966-7821.