And, now, for a real L.A....

And, now, for a real L.A. event:

We’ve just received an invitation, in the form of a parking receipt (No. 64314), for the “grand opening and ribbon-cutting ceremonies” of the Shrine Auditorium’s “recently completed multilevel parking structure!”

Black tire optional.

Alex Auerbach of Sherman Oaks felt a nostalgic twinge when he spotted a “special” at a Target store, which was offering books for $3.33 apiece--or three for $10.

“When my grandfather ran a tiny neighborhood grocery store in Hell’s Kitchen some 70 years ago,” Auerbach recalled, “he had a big sign posted by the cans of tuna fish: ‘8 cents each, three for a quarter.’ ”

“Enough New Yorkers bought three for a quarter, thereby contributing an extra penny to the cash register, that my grandfather was able to buy the tenement that housed his store, and pursue his first love: playing pinochle long into the night.”

Added Auerbach: “In memory of my grandfather, I laid out 10 bucks for three.”

From our Only in Hollywood Bureau:

A Hollywood Hills resident received a phone call on Wednesday night from a research firm that quizzed him on prospective movies. At one point he was asked if he was familiar with the just-revealed case of the dismemberment killings in Milwaukee. Then he was asked if that case would deter him from seeing a coming film about a doctor who traffics in body parts.

Another reason it’s fun to live in Southern California:

When you’re stalled in freeway traffic, you can read billboard ads that show beer bottles and say:

“One bottleneck you’ll look forward to.”

Technology on the hop:

The Folk Tree Collection in Pasadena is exhibiting the latest miracle of science, the Frog Earthquake Detector ($190). The designer, Taos artist Pozzi Franzetti, guarantees that when an earthquake strikes, the creature will vibrate.

A survey by InterCommunications Inc. found that fewer than 10% of the press releases sent to Southern California newsrooms are ever read.

In a press release about the study, InterComm boss Kent C. Cooper said: “It’s common knowledge within our profession that the preponderance

of. . . .”

Make that fewer than 9%.

miscelLAny:

The dusty pueblo of L.A. boasted 110 saloons in 1870, or about one for every 50 residents. Today, L.A. has about one bar for every 800 residents.