As Emil Relleve disembarked from a taxi...

As Emil Relleve disembarked from a taxi in Montreal, a passerby pointed out that he had dropped some money in the street. When Relleve bent down to pick it up, the stranger--a woman--snatched his wife’s suitcase and ran off.

Back home in Lakewood, Emil and his wife, Rosalie, received a call from a Good Samaritan who had found the bag. Though she asked for no money, Relleve sent her a reward, and the suitcase arrived a month later. All of the contents, including a camera, were inside.

But Relleve had an unexpected memento. When he had the film in the camera developed, he found an extra photo, which apparently shows the thief going through his wife’s bag.

“We are going to send it to the police,” he said.

He’s still somewhat baffled by it all. And he is uncertain whether the Good Samaritan was involved, though he notes that she spoke with a French accent, while the suitcase thief did not.

No sooner did we announce that rock singer Joe Walsh, formerly of the Eagles, had announced he would seek the vice presidential nomination in 1992, than actor Tom Laughlin said he’s considering running for the top spot. Luckily, the FCC equal-time doctrine would prevent TV stations from rerunning his 1977 film, “Billy Jack Goes to Washington.”

And Al Greenwood of Long Beach--the self-styled Bedspread King--said he’s going to try for the White House. No doubt one of his campaign pledges will be to spruce up Lincoln’s bed.

Who, you might ask, would march outside City Hall in favor of junk mail--and against Mayor Bradley’s efforts to reduce it?

Why, an L.A. company that specializes in mass mailings, of course.

“Honk if You Junk Mail,” said some of the posters. Passing traffic seemed unusually quiet.

Statue-toppling is the rage in Eastern Europe but the trend hasn’t taken root in the City of Angels.

There have been a few sculpture attacks here over the years, but of the apolitical type. The nose on Rudolph Valentino’s statue in Hollywood was lopped off. So was one of Florence Nightingale’s arms in Lincoln Park. Someone stole the granny glasses off a bronze of John Lennon in the City Mall (the work was later moved to New York City). And, of course, Tommy Trojan has been doused with UCLA-blue paint numerous times.

No subversive types were honored here, unless you count Joan of Arc, standing defiantly in front of the former French Hospital (now the Pacific Alliance Center) in Chinatown.

Au contraire, L.A. has a statue of one of the great anti-Communists outside Great Western Bank in Beverly Hills--John Wayne.

Richard Boehm was chatting on a car phone in the Wilshire area when a motorcyclist collided with a car in front of him.

“The guy whose car I was in said, ‘Get off the phone and call 911,’ ” Boehm said. “While I’m doing that, another person was walking across the street with a portable phone in his hand and he dialed 911. And a woman who was driving in the other direction stopped and yelled out the window that she was calling 911.”

Needless to say, Boehm added, “the ambulance arrived right away.”

Sure, water conservation is important but, after all, San Marino has appearances to keep up.

A restroom in a Home Savings in that city displays a sign that says:

“Please Flush After Every Use.”

miscelLAny:

The oldest existing residence in L.A. is the 173-year-old Avila Adobe, a state historical landmark on Olvera Street that was originally the home of an early alcalde (mayor) of the pueblo.