MAKING IT WORK : Mom and Dad Could Learn a Few Things Themselves

It’s not easy for parents to talk to their kids about sex, especially if the subject was taboo in the home in which they grew up, says Lori Seeboth, Community Education coordinator for Planned Parenthood.

She said Planned Parenthood offers classes to help parents improve their communication techniques (call (714) 973-1733 for information). And she offers these tips for parents who want their teen-agers to be able to turn to them when they have questions about sex:

* Don’t be afraid to admit that talking about sex makes you uncomfortable. Understanding this helps teen-agers feel a bond with their parents that eases their own discomfort.

* Encourage teen-agers to sort out their feelings before becoming sexually active by asking themselves such questions as: Am I doing this because I want to be popular? Am I being exploited or exploiting another person? Am I ready to accept the consequences of my actions?

* Recognize your teen-ager’s talents and accomplishments. High self-esteem makes young people less vulnerable to peer pressure.

* Look for teachable moments. Use opportunities such as a friend’s pregnancy, a newspaper article or a TV show to introduce a sensitive topic.

* Don’t be embarrassed if your teen-ager asks a question you can’t answer. Once you admit you’re stumped, you and your child can find the answer together.