San Marcos Firm Leaks News That the U.S. Economy Is Sealing Itself Up
Offered now as proof that American business ingenuity is alive and kicking is a product called Brief Relief made by a small San Marcos firm.
A disposable product for which a U.S. patent has been received. A product in use by people who fly planes, shinny up poles or slither down sewers.
A product, as its innovators would have it, that answers the age-old question: Where do you go when you’ve got to go and there’s nowhere to go?
Simply put, Brief Relief (“The Portable Pit Stop”) is a resealable plastic bag that can contain up to 16 ounces of human urine. And neutralize it with a secret blend of (lemon-scented) polymers, enzymes and deodorizers.
“We can imagine a day when every car, toolbox or purse has a Brief Relief,” said Terry Cassidy, vice president of American Innotek Inc. “We can see they’d be very popular with people stuck in L.A. traffic.”
So far, Brief Relief has been limited to bulk orders: the L.A. Department of Water & Power, the maintenance division at the city of San Diego, and SDG&E; (for line crews).
“When nature calls, it won’t accept a busy signal,” explains an SDG&E; official.
Soon, Brief Relief may hit your neighborhood store.
“When we go to the consumer market, we’ll probably put it in colors and put some pizazz on the packaging,” Cassidy said. “We’ve already got the splash, back-flow and funnel problems solved.”
Cost is $3 per. That may seem high, but if you get 100 miles from the nearest rest stop (or can imagine being so), it’ll seem like a bargain, Cassidy reasons.
Cassidy runs the business with her husband, Cass, who used to work for Kodak and La Jolla Technologies. Brief Relief has been three years in the research-and-development phase.
There you have it: The American entrepreneurial spirit in full flower: finding a need, developing a product, adding to the gross national product, strengthening (and comforting) the middle class, etc.
Be warned, you smirking Japanese business and political types who think Americans are inferior, innovation-wise.
Computers and microchips may be keen things. But when the need really arises, who wouldn’t trade a boxcar of electronic doodads for some Brief Relief?
Who’s Juggling San Diego’s Taxes
A few good words.
* As income tax time approaches, you should be informed that San Diego has accountants/tax preparers named Fudge, Cheatem and Slick.
Also, Faust, in case you’re looking for a bargain.
* How insecure are television anchor people about losing their jobs?
There’s a small booklet stashed just behind where the anchors sit at KNSD-Channel 39: “Surviving Unemployment: You’re Not Alone.”
* Josef Germaine is the new cantor at Ner Tamid congregation in Rancho Bernardo. So says an announcement by Lord Public Relations.
* Yes, 9-to-5 Gourmet, the snack and gift store in Mira Mesa, will provide you with small, chewy candies that say, in small print, “---- Off.”
In case you want to deliver an insult with a smile.
* Jan Percival says she went to a psychic, Jackie Valdez, in Carlsbad to ask about stress reduction.
She advised a “spontaneous personal abduction.” Translation: a vacation.
How to Get the Fax Straight
Back talk.
A newsroom with which I’m familiar has the following Official Memo posted in the fax room:
On days of America’s Cup racing, the 3:30 person will be responsible for doing the Cup boxes and standings (examples in SD CUP). The ACOC will NOT be faxing the results--we need to use the ‘poll’ function on our fax to retrieve them from their fax.
Instructions on polling to follow:
CLERKS ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR FAMILIARIZING THEMSELVES WITH CUP AGATE. Contact Kevin if there are any questions.
Poll instructions:
1. Dial 9, then 7-digit number.
2. Open lid on right and press poll button.
3. Push green button.
That’s the official stuff.
Unofficially someone has scrawled: “Stand back when buzzer sounds.”
