He Was in the Locker Room When Words Came Out Wrong

Frank Luksa, writing in Pro Football Weekly, reminisces about his 30 years covering the NFL and the malaprops and quips he remembers.

Vince Ferragamo, a former Ram quarterback, referring to his coach, the late Ray Malavasi: “He never relinquishes my disbelief.” Bill Peterson, former Houston Oiler coach upon his induction into the Florida Hall of Fame: “I want to thank everyone who helped me get indicted.”

And from Chuck Knox: “Most of my cliches aren’t original.”

Trivia time: Who holds the NFL record for most interceptions in a season?

Prophet: Before John Elway led the Denver Broncos on a winning touchdown drive in the closing minutes against the Raiders Sunday night, TNT analyst Pat Haden said: “This guy has made more comebacks than Richard Nixon.”

Earlier, commenting on Raider quarterback Jay Schroeder, Haden said: “(Jay Schroeder) sometimes has the accuracy of your local weatherman.”

Heavy stuff: Jay Leno, discussing the show “American Gladiators”: It’s a show for people who like big-time wrestling, but have trouble following the plot.”

Saving catch: James Lofton had an added incentive to get the the NFL’s all-time receiving yards record against the Rams Sunday in Buffalo.

“I had about 100 people come into town for the game this weekend,” he said. “I’m sitting there thinking, ‘I can’t pay for all of these people to go to San Francisco.’ ”

The Bills play the 49ers next Sunday, but Lofton won’t have to spring for his friends. He got the record with a four-yard catch late in the game to move him two yards past Steve Largent’s mark of 13,089 yards.

The spoiler: Stan Fischler, writing in Inside Sports, says that King owner Bruce McNall spoils his players.

“A look at Jari Kurri will attest to that,” Fischler writes. “Handed a million-dollar deal after being imported from Italy, the once flashy Finn looked like Yertle-the-Turtle on right wing last year.”

Trivia answer: Dick (Night Train) Lane of the Rams, with 14 in 1952.

Quotebook: Jose Canseco, after playing in his first game with the Texas Rangers since being traded by the Oakland Athletics: “It’s like the All-Star game, where you get to play with other players and then you go back to your team. Only I’m not going back.”