If your time is money, take the...

If your time is money, take the easy way out and do your holiday shopping by mail. While the packaging on some of these products may not be fancy, and postage is usually extra, it beats struggling with strapping tape or waiting in long UPS lines.

These are wonderful products that would make any food fan happy, and each distributor guarantees delivery by Christmas.

It tastes kind of sugary. Its texture is on the dry side. And it’s a Southern institution. It’s a Moon Pie--three big soft layers of graham cracker cookie, filled with marshmallow and dipped in frosting. Some people heat them and then put ice cream on top, but most are eaten straight out of the package. For $11.95 plus shipping, Bird Brain International, the largest purveyor of Moon Pie brand apparel and accessories, will send 24 of the disks.

Bird Brain International, P.O. Box 630509, Houston, Tex. 77263-0509; (713) 977-7186. American Express. Cutoff for Christmas orders is Dec. 15.

Eight years ago, Lenneke and Walter Bulk moved from their native Holland to a farm in Escalon, where they began to make cheese. Their all-natural Gouda (aged five to six months), has an outstanding sharpish flavor and a smooth texture. It keeps indefinitely--and only gets better. Sold in 10-pound wheels, it costs $3.55 per pound, plus shipping.

Bulk Farms, 17487 E. Lone Tree Road, Escalon, Calif. 95320; (209) 838-2491. MasterCard, Visa. Cutoff for Christmas orders is Dec. 18.

Lea Jean Nimmo’s fudge-y frosted brownies are truly incredible. Not too sweet, the rich butter bars pack a chocolate wallop. In fact they are so rich, they’re half-way to being fudge. A dozen large brownies (they weigh in at about a quarter pound apiece) cost $21.95, plus shipping, and you can mix any of 13 flavors.

Choc-o-Lea’s, 1300 Jez Road, Ladysmith, Wis. 54848; (800) 437-0431. MasterCard, Visa, American Express. Cutoff for Christmas orders is Dec. 21.

It took a while, but Jim Scott finally came up with the fudge he remembered from his youth. The result is an expensive fudge, packed in a hand-crafted knotty-pine box; it has a remarkable chocolate flavor and a wonderfully creamy consistency. Great Scott! Fudge sampler costs $24, plus shipping and handling. It includes a 1/2 pound each of plain, macadamia nut and walnut versions.

Great Scott! Fudge Kitchen, 3621 Brooks St., Missoula, Mont. 59801; (800) 462-9639, Ext. 1060. MasterCard or Visa. Cutoff for Christmas is Dec. 16.

Giddyap. This black peppercorn steak sauce, swimming with bits of cracked black pepper, adds just the right kick to any steak or burger. But you don’t have to love meat to enjoy the sauce; it’s just as good as a glaze for shrimp or slathered on fish. The company also makes a newer (and nippier) prairie-fire version. For $12.95, you can get two 10-ounce bottles of the stuff postage paid anywhere in the continental United States.

Johnny Midnight, P.O. Box 98, Buffalo, Wyo. 82834; (800) 553-2512. MasterCard, Visa, American Express. Cutoff for Christmas orders is Dec. 18.

The average Californian eats pizza only 20 times a year. People from Chicago, however, eat almost twice that much. And no wonder. Lou Malnati’s Chicago-style pizzas are thick-crusted pies--topped with fresh tomato sauce, fresh mozzarella and maybe pepperoni or sausage--baked in brick-lined ovens. For $34.95 the restaurant will send two of the 9-inch hefty deep-dish pies by Federal Express anywhere in the continental United States.

Lou Malnati’s Pizzeria, 6649 N. Lincoln Ave., Lincolnwood, Ill. 60645; (800) 4-MALNAT. Visa, MasterCard, American Express. Cutoff for Christmas orders is Dec. 14.

Dried fruit doesn’t have to be boring. The moist, flavorful fruit from Sun-Touched Select is proof. David Swall’s quality California-grown produce--peaches, apricots, nectarines, apples and more--are slowly dehydrated in small batches at low temperatures. A 2-pound wooden box costs $29.45, including postage and handling. If this seems expensive, keep in mind that a pound is the equivalent to 5 to 6 pounds of fresh fruit.

Sun-Touched Select, 15999 Avenue 232, Tulare, Calif. 93274; (800) 255-7039. MasterCard, Visa. Cutoff for Christmas orders is Dec. 15.

OK, so you can’t put it under the tree. But this old-fashioned ice cream is sooooooo good that people in St. Louis have been lining up to buy it ever since the tiny family-run roadside stand opened in 1929. For $68.31, you can get six quarts of custard, packed in dry ice, delivered the next day.

Ted Drewes, 6726 Chippewa St., St. Louis, Mo. 63109; (314) 481-2652. MasterCard, Visa. Cutoff for Christmas orders is Dec. 22.

Why mail-order raspberry jam? Because this is the very best you’ll ever taste. Only raspberries and a tiny amount of sugar are used, so the fruit spread is extraordinarily intense. The low sugar content makes the spread slightly runny. It also makes it low in calories--a teaspoon has only 7 1/2. A 10-ounce jar costs $4.55 including shipping.

Whistling Wings Farm, 427 West St., Biddeford, Me . 04005; (800) 765-8989. MasterCard, Visa. Cutoff for Christmas orders is Dec. 16.

Loomis Cheese Co. produces America’s only Cheshire-style cheese, using 150-year-old cast-iron cheese presses. The company doesn’t sell its strong, flavorful cheese by mail, but you can order it from Zingerman’s, an upscale Ann Arbor deli that specializes in gourmet food products, for $7.99 a pound.

Zingerman’s Delicatessen, 422 Detroit St., Ann Arbor, Mich. 48104; (313) 663-3354. MasterCard, Visa. Cutoff for Christmas orders is Dec. 15.