HIGH LIFE: A WEEKLY FORUM FOR HIGH SCHOOL STUDENTS : Just Between Us, It’s Personal

One of the surest definitions of a good friend is someone in whom you can confide your secrets. But at what point does a confidant become just another nosy person? Hot Topics asks: “What things are too personal to discuss with others?”

“When you’re with good friends, ones you can trust with your deepest secrets, I don’t think there is anything too personal to discuss, except (1) certain problems I was born with that are embarrassing for me to deal with every day, and (2) my weight.”

Shawna Johnsen, 19,

senior, San Clemente

“(Someone) having a sexually transmitted disease.”

Todd Belitz, 17,

junior, Edison

“Sex.”

Cynthia Vo, 15,

freshman, Los Amigos

“Boyfriends and girlfriends, especially to Asian parents, because they don’t want you to have one.”

Paula Nguyen, 17,

senior, University

“Sex is an extremely embarrassing and personal subject to discuss with others, because you do not know who you can or cannot trust, and you may end up with a bad reputation.”

Yvette Galindo, 15,

sophomore, Buena Park

“Shoe size. It says a lot about a person.”

Tracy Lomax, 18,

senior, Katella

“Your feelings about a new relationship you’re unsure about.”

Kim Lee, 18,

senior, Saddleback

“I would say sex lives. I just feel it is something that should be discussed with partners, not with others, as everyday conversation.”

Lijan Puthuvalil, 17,

junior, Laguna Hills

“Sex and relationships. Because they are embarrassing to talk about with some people.”

Heather Stokes, 15,

sophomore, Katella

“Family problems are really difficult to discuss. Serious subjects need to be talked about, but who can we go to without feeling embarrassed?”

Ajay Goud, 15,

sophomore, Edison

“My eating habits.”

Matt Fishbeck, 18,

senior, Huntington Beach

“It is too personal to discuss certain people around others, because I have friends who dislike other friends of mine for no apparent reason, and when I stick up for them, they tend to use it against me.”

Curtis Rasmussen, 17,

junior, Buena Park

“That’s something for me to know and for everybody else to find out!”

Nillosar Nejat-bina, 17,

senior, Brea-Olinda

“My fears. Because knowing them will give people the ability to hurt me.”

Son Vu, 16,

junior, St. Michael’s

“Grades, because sometimes I do not do good, and I do not like to tell other people.”

Michele Wasserman, 15,

sophomore, Laguna Hills

“My true feelings, because it’s difficult to face the rejection and negative reactions of others.”

Dephanie Yim, 17,

junior, Buena Park

“Probably your sex life, because it’s between you and that person.”

Hieng Hong, 17,

junior, Saddleback

“Death is a personal thing to talk about when you want, ‘cause I don’t want to face that peak.”

Su Hong, 16,

sophomore, Los Amigos

“A person’s sex life is probably one of the most personal things in a person’s life. What you and your partner do in private is special and personal. I don’t think you should brag about that to anyone. I would not discuss what I did on my date with my girlfriend with anyone, because what we do together should be shared only by us.”

Anthony Nguyen, 15,

freshman, Los Amigos

“Certain parts of your social life. Girlfriends and problems with people. I am a quiet guy. . . . It’s good to be open with your parents, and it’s very important for a trusting relationship, but there are things that are just better left unsaid and kept to yourself.”

Riley Breckenridge, 18,

senior, University

“Private moments with chicks and failures in ice hockey.”

Jack Wlodkowsk, 17,

junior, Huntington Beach

“Nothing is too personal to talk about with my friends. But when it comes to my parents, well, that’s a different story.”

Leah Klinge, 15,

sophomore, Edison

“Your innermost secrets and something you feel is too personal to reveal to others.”

Rahima Surani, 14,

freshman, Brea-Olinda

“My family’s secrets. Because they are important only to my family members.”

Chuck Sesma, 17,

junior, St. Michael’s

“Your income is a personal matter, and also your past.”

Juliana Young, 17,

senior, Saddleback

“Probably sex, because it is a personal matter.”

Tony Robles, 14,

freshman, Huntington Beach

Next Week’s Hot Topic:

What’s the most creative excuse you’ve ever used for not turning in a homework assignment?

Responses were gathered by Hallie Kim (Brea-Olinda), Sam Kang (Buena Park), Yana Yanovsky (Edison), Morgan Howard (Huntington Beach), David Fitzgerald (Katella), Loren Colin (Laguna Hills), Jennifer Chau (Los Amigos), Regina Hoang (Saddleback), Nancy Kurtz (San Clemente), Eric Thomson (St. Michael’s) and Eileen Hsu (University).