A Romance That Flowered in a Personals Way

They say newspapers are obsolete. They say that, nowadays, what brings people together is the instant glue of videotape and sound bites.

But don’t tell that to Kristin Franks, a girl with good manners from small-town Michigan, and Robert Munjko, a dating specialist from Hawthorne. They would never have met had it not been for the personal ads in a big-city newspaper, the very newspaper, in fact, that you are holding.

It’s true that playing Cupid is not on the same order of magnitude as, say, blowing the lid off government malfeasance, but we take pride in our varied accomplishments here at your favorite paper. And the union of Kristin and Robert is certainly one of them.

A week ago Saturday, they tied the knot in Vegas, having purchased for $139 the basic package (organist, flowers, videocassette, and limo ride) at the Little White Chapel on the Strip. Predecessors down that particular aisle of love have included Joan Collins and Michael Jordan, though not, of course, together.

*

The story began nine months ago in a Torrance music store, where Robert, a 32-year-old tool maker, was shopping for CDs with his friend Ed. Robert had something of a reputation. After his divorce four years ago, he took a number of courses with titles such as “Meeting the Right Person.” He was known for his glib approach to potential love mates.

“I had a habit of walking up to women and saying, ‘I don’t normally do this, but would you be interested in having a cup of coffee with me, or a meal sometime? How would you like to work it out? Would you like to take my number, or would you like me to take yours?’ ”

The low-pressure approach.

It usually worked.

So, as Robert eyed an attractive young woman behind the counter, Ed said: “You gonna do it?”

“Nah,” said Robert. The girl looked too much like a college student, he thought. They probably would never get along.

Some months later, at the urging of his co-workers, Robert decided to take out an ad in the personals. The service is free and he was feeling frisky. His ad listed his age (32), height (5 feet, 8 inches) and interests (skiing, dinner, movies) and goal (friendship +).

Kristin, a 29-year-old administrator for a mobile office company, read the ads for fun. Divorced for nearly a year, she hadn’t been dating much.

“I thought they were like the funnies. But then, I don’t know, I thought, ‘Why not look for me?’ ”

When she dialed the number listed in Robert’s ad and heard his taped message, she thought he had two things going for him: same first name as her father and geographic desirability.

She left her number.

He called the next day and, after a long conversation, during which he asked her weight and she refused on principle to answer, they made a date. She would pick him up.

“So where do you live?” he asked.

“I live by El Segundo and Inglewood.”

“Wait a minute,” he said. “I live by El Segundo and Inglewood! Do you live by Hawthorne High?”

Turned out she wouldn’t have to spend too much on gas to pick him up; they lived four blocks apart.

*

The day before Kristin answered his ad, Robert was in his truck (BEA HAPY) near his house in Hawthorne when he noticed a white Camaro (REBEL 2).

“I thought it must be some redneck geek,” he said. But as he passed the Camaro, he noticed a young woman behind the wheel. “Pretty cute,” he thought. “Must be the geek’s girlfriend.”

Actually, it was the girl from the music store.

*

Now, Kristin has what she calls the “bad habit” of arriving exactly on time or very early.

Robert, who had been shocked by the obesity of a recent blind date, had been planning to stake Kristin out from his neighbor’s living room window. If she wasn’t what he hoped, he didn’t want his disappointment to show.

But when she knocked on the door, he was still undressed. He answered the door, buttoning his pants, and uttered these memorable first words: “You’re half an hour early!”

He was surprised again when they walked outside and got into her car, a white Camaro . . . with REBEL 2 plates.

The evening went well--dinner, a glass of wine at his home in front of the fire, a walk on the beach. But both of them were too experienced not to do some planning. Robert deliberately left windows open when they went to dinner. When they returned, he remarked on the chill and threw a log on the fire. Kristin had arranged with a friend to be beeped during dinner, just in case she wanted an excuse to leave.

“You’re kidding! “ he said last week. “Is that who that was?”

*

On Christmas Day, a mere month after their first date, Kristin asked Robert to sit on his couch and close his eyes.

“Pretend you’re in a cabin in the mountains,” she said. “Pretend it’s snowing outside.” He heard some rustling.

“All right! “ he thought, “she’s giving me a boudoir photo of herself!”

Kristin couldn’t figure out why Robert was starting to snicker.

She told him to hold out his hand. She put a ring in his palm and proposed.

Robert was speechless. (“Also,” he said, “a little disappointed since I was expecting the photo.”)

He recovered and accepted.

The only downside we can think of is that instead of two subscriptions, they’ll only be needing one now.