Fowl play: Police officers from the 77th...

Fowl play: Police officers from the 77th Division, responding to a late-night report of a stolen bicycle, arrived at the home of the victim, where a small party was in progress. The owner told officers that he had been alerted to the theft by his back-yard pet. A watchdog? Not exactly. “My rooster came out and started crowing,” he explained.

Yabba, dabba do!We’re sure that some snobs will refuse to attend the coming movie version of “The Flintstones”--but only because they’ve forgotten the cartoon series’ cultural contributions.

Fred and Wilma, as well as neighbors Barney and Betty Rubble, are etched in stone, so to speak, in the book, “UCLA Slang,” which is to American youngsters what the Oxford English Dictionary is to the civilized world.

The “Flintstones” cast inspired these generic terms:

* fred Socially unacceptable person, freeloader, idiot, klutz, geek: “When Mark missed an easy shot during a basketball game his teammates called him a fred .”

* wilma Ugly girl: That ugly girl must never groom herself. She is a total wilma .”

* barney Person who’s not with it, nerd; ugly guy: “My blind date turned out to be a total barney .”

* betty Pretty girl (used by males): “The girl in abnormal psychology is a definite betty .”

Owned by a consortium of developers?A sign outside City Hall inadvertently reveals it’s off-limits to the average taxpayer. Then, again, any barney knows that.

Some people can’t take a joke: As we mentioned, KIIS-FM/AM disc jockey Rick Dees aired a hoax on Monday, telling listeners that their toilets might explode because of a supposed sewer blockage in the Southland. Several hundred panicky residents phoned L.A. County and Orange County water and sanitation agencies, tying up their lines for most of the morning.

We theorized that Dees, whose TV show folded a while back, was trying to gain some attention because his fall radio ratings had “gone down the tubes” to No. 5. Actually, they had only tumbled to No. 4. And Dees is No. 2 in the just-released monthly ratings. “His career has not gone down the tubes,” summed up a spokeswoman.

Oh, we know that.

April Fools, Rick!

miscelLAny:

Who says Southern California has no history? A recent TV special on Lucille Ball and Desi Arnaz revealed that in the 1950s they lived in Chatsworth, where they called their pet cow “The Duchess of Devonshire.”