Is This Platitude Half-Full or Half-Empty?
A cartoon has been tacked to the bulletin board in the office where I work. It shows the boss sitting at a conference table with some people he bosses around.
“I’ve got some good news and bad news to report,” the boss says. “The good news is this company is weathering the recession well enough to expand into new markets.
“The bad news--we’re paying for it with what would have been your raises.”
Sardonic decor serves a valuable purpose in the workplace. It helps the workers grin and bear it. It fosters esprit de corps , if not necessarily the sort of esprit de corps that management would like to see. In another newsroom where I worked, this classic message in Old English lettering was on display for months: “The Flogging Will Continue Until Morale Improves.”
If you happen to be looking for something subversive for your office or lunchroom, here’s a word of advice: Don’t shop at Successories.
Perhaps you’ve seen the outlets in your neighborhood mall. There’s one at Northridge Fashion Plaza, at Topanga Plaza and the Promenade in Woodland Hills. Successories is a new chain of stores that specializes in attitude-- good attitudes, upbeat attitudes, the kind of attitudes that management loves.
There are quotes from the likes of Abraham Lincoln, Winston Churchill and Martin Luther King Jr. There’s a book devoted to the motivational words of football coach Vince Lombardi. Ann Landers sneaks in here and there.
There are also aphorisms of obscure origin condensed and printed on T-shirts and coffee mugs, plaques and posters. Some are graced with heroic images of soaring eagles, daring skiers, triumphant mountaineers.
A typical poster extolling “effort” depicts a rock climber atop a peak. “Some people dream of worthy accomplishments,” it says, “while others stay awake and do them.” (This has inspired me to get another cup of coffee.)
“Attitude” itself inspires a variety of platitudes.
“A new attitude invariably creates a new result.”
“Attitudes are contagious. Is yours worth catching?”
“Attitude: If it is to be, it is up to me.”
“Attitude is everything.”
“Attitude is a little thing that makes a big difference.”
Now, I don’t mean to suggest that there’s anything necessarily wrong with good attitudes. It’s fine if you think the glass is half-full. Maybe an eagle on your wall really will help your sales soar, even in a recession.
As a matter of ironic fact, the recession has put a silver lining in Successories, according to Brian McGilvray, who oversees California operations for Celex Group Inc. Jane Applegate, in her syndicated Small Business column in The Times, reported in August on how McGilvray had invested $250,000 in opening the three Valley franchises. McGilvray on Monday happily reported that, as of Oct. 1, Celex Group Inc. had bought back stores in a deal that made McGilvray California regional vice president of Successories.
In these tight times, McGilvray explained, companies that aren’t giving large cash bonuses or raises are instead presenting employees with leather-bound books and plaques to illustrate appreciation for their work.
McGilvray likes to tell of the division president of a defense contractor who, after being forced to lay off hundreds of employees, bought hundreds of copies of a book of sayings titled “The Power of Goals” for remaining employees.
“The whole thought is they want people to have a daily reminder of what their mission is--of why they’re in business. And you don’t do that by giving someone cash.”
This made me think of the T-shirt and coffee cup that I and thousands of my co-workers were given a couple of years back after achieving a circulation goal. The cup, I soon discovered, had a hairline fracture and bled coffee on my desk. Now it’s in a box somewhere.
At the Northridge Successories, saleswoman Michele Griner assured me that the store would accept return of all faulty coffee cups.
“We practice what we preach,” Griner said. (“Rule No. 1,” according to a poster: “If we don’t take care of the customer . . . somebody else will.”)
There was one customer in the store. Kim Burckert of Sylmar was picking a new shirt for husband Bob’s wardrobe and some mugs as gifts. She explained that Bob, a quality-control supervisor for a bottle manufacturer, likes to make his fashion statements on the job.
Why, that same morning, Bob had gone off to work in a T-shirt that declared: “We can’t spell s ccess without U.” His new T-shirt says: “Safety. Safety. Safety. Safety. Think Safety. It’s worth repeating.”
Bob’s intentions are sincere, Burckert says, but that hasn’t kept his crew from engaging in some good-natured teasing about just who, exactly, he’s trying to impress. “They tell him, ‘What are you trying to do? Suck up?’ ” Kim said with a laugh. “They like to rib him.”
Scott Harris’ column appears Tuesdays, Thursdays and Sundays. Readers may write Harris at The Times Valley Edition, 20000 Prairie St., Chatsworth, Calif. 91311.
‘Some people dream of worthy accomplishments while others stay awake and do them.’ (This has inspired me to get another cup of coffee.)
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