Here, a Forced Smile Is Better Than No Smile

Officials in Lillehammer, Norway, want their sometimes dour residents to look cheerful during next year’s Winter Olympics. So they are testing smile holders.

The smile holders work by attaching a plastic hook in each corner of the wearer’s mouth so their smiles can be adjusted--from mere grins to broad smiles--by moving an elastic band attaching the two hooks.

“Norwegians can be a little reserved, and have trouble smiling on some occasions,” said Jarleif Haugen, of the Oppland township in the Olympic region. “We wanted a gimmick that was a little humorous in our campaign to have people appear pleasant to visitors.”

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Trivia time: The Houston Rockets have won their first 13 games this season. What is the NBA season-opening winning streak record?

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Two generations: Robert Parish of the Celtics was completing his freshman season at Centenary, averaging 23 points and 18.7 rebounds a game the year Golden State Warrior rookie Chris Webber was born. Parish, 40, is the oldest player in the NBA. Webber, 20, is the youngest.

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Parish again: After Isiah Thomas broke his hand punching Detroit Piston teammate Bill Laimbeer, Parish was quoted by George Shirk of the San Francisco Chronicle: “If you’re going to break your hand, then you may as well break it on him.”

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Happy losers: Southern University opened its basketball season by whipping Patten College, 154-57--and the losing coach wasn’t unhappy with the result.

“My goal was to reach 50 points,” said Patten Coach Irvin Jones. “I felt if we reached 50, we’d come out with a moral victory.” Patten is an NAIA school in Oakland, playing its first year of basketball.

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Money man: Bernhard Langer won the most money per start on the PGA tour with an average of $104,490 per tournament. Nick Price, the leading money winner with $1,478,557, averaged $82,142.

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Just a youngster: According to San Francisco columnist Herb Caen, Joe DiMaggio spent Thanksgiving Day--his 79th birthday--in a San Francisco hospital, apparently to receive a pacemaker. Wrote Caen: “His arthritis is now so severe he probably couldn’t hit more than 25 homers a season.”

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The worst: Texas El Paso ended its football season with 10 straight losses, allowing an average of more than 40 points during the streak.

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Trivia answer: 15, by the Washington Capitols at the outset of the 1948-49 season.

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Quotebook: Quebec goaltender Jocelyn Thibault, assessing the work of Jim Anderson, usually a junior-league referee, after filling in for striking NHL officials in the Nordiques’ 8-6 win over the Kings last Thursday: “The referee must have thought it was an atom or pee-wee game.”