MUSIC : 1st Jewish Lesbian Folk Singer Ever Is Always Phranc : Funny and entertaining, she is set to perform in Santa Barbara. When she’s not singing, she’s surfing.

Phranc, “the world’s first Jewish lesbian folk singer,” obviously isn’t your average girl next door. For one, with her trademark drill sergeant’s flat top, Phranc looks like the boy next door. This gender-bender may look like Robert DeNiro, but she sings like Joan Baez. She’s also phrantically phunny, that phinhead pholkie, Phranc.

Who else would do a song called “Shame Shame on ABC for Casting Jackie Smith to Play Jackie Kennedy”? She also has songs about the ex-L. A. County coroner, Thomas Noguchi, who wasn’t nearly as cool as Jack Klugman on “Quincy.”

You probably won’t see Phranc at the Tropicana in Hollywood, where people from Iowa mistake each other for movie stars watching groovy girls get gooey. Phranc will tell you all about why she hates “Female Mud Wrestling.” Her “Amazons” song is about female jocks--as are many others, including “One of the Girls” and “M.A.R.T.I.N.A.”

Phranc, long a mainstay on the L. A. scene, has been in a number of bands such as Nervous Gender, Catholic Discipline and a band whose name now is even scarier than before, Castration Squad. She’s been solo for the last decade, and stranger than usual since chopping off her waist-length hair when she was 17.

When she’s not singing, Phranc is surfing, giving swimming lessons and/or thinking about her fourth album. And she’s added a whole new dimension to her act. Let’s let Phranc tell us about it.

Your last album was in 1991. Where the heck have you been?

Basically, I took the last two years off, but I’m planning to come back and record an album for an undetermined label. I’ll be doing a show called Hot August Phranc, which will be a tribute to Neil Diamond, including all his hits. I’ll even have chest hair. Acoustic Phranc will open with a 30-minute set; then it’s Hot August Phranc, with a full band.

Neil Diamond? Quit it.

It all happened by accident. In 1989, I was at a folk festival in Mariposa doing a seminar called “The Worst Song I Ever Learned.” Anyway, mine was “Solitary Man,” which was my worst experience with this horrible guitar teacher. Anyway, I did the song and everyone was cracking up, seeing this dyke doing “Solitary Man.” I’m really excited about this show because, for a change, I don’t have to be me. We’ve done the show a few times around L. A., and Neil Diamond knows about it, but he’s always off on the weekends riding his Harley, so he’s never showed up. I’m a big fan of his now; I’m going to his show at the Forum this month.

Does anyone still want to be a folk singer?

Well, yeah. There’s still people who want to play acoustic music. Folk music never really goes away, even though people tend to focus on whatever they think is hip at the moment. The last Nancy Griffith album, for example, was all covers. She said she did that to continue the folk tradition.

Is the folk tradition to be serious and funny all at once?

Yes, it’s that, but it’s also to tell a story and be true to your emotions. Folk music is very honest.

Apparently you still have the same barber--are people still shocked by your appearance or is that over? Also, what’s the price to pay for being different?

I hope it’s over. There’s always a price to pay for being who you are. There’s a lot more people that are out of the closet now. Things are better than they used to be and getting better, but things still aren’t terrific.

On one of your old bios, it said your mission was to take the lesbian culture to the big world. Is that still your mission?

Did I say that? I don’t know what my mission is now. I guess it’s to keep performing and have a good time. I’ve had so much grief in my life the last few years, it’s important to focus on being alive. A few years ago, I was touring with Morrissey when my brother was murdered. So my label, Island, dropped me when I couldn’t continue with the tour.

Did they get the person who did it?

Yes, but I don’t want to get into it in the press.

Anything stranger than a tour with Morrissey?

Oh God, let me think. One time, I played this festival somewhere in the middle of Italy. It was put on by some weird political party. There were lots of boots and black leather. After driving all day, we got there and they didn’t want us to perform. The Julio Iglesias guy of Italy didn’t want us there. So that was the strangest gig I never played.

What happened to those Dodgers?

I don’t know. I’m not much into baseball, I’m more into surfing. I usually surf in Malibu, but I’ve surfed C Street in Ventura. I’m hoping to do some surfing on the Rincon the day of the show if a swell comes in.

What advice would you give aspiring musicians who are trapped with their MTV dreams at McDonald’s?

I’d say go ahead and make your own record and don’t wait for someone to come along. My first album I made myself with $1,500 I earned giving swimming lessons, then I shopped it to Rhino. I made my second album, “I Enjoy Being a Girl,” with my own money and shopped it to Island. My third album, “Positively Phranc,” was the only one that’s been paid for by a label. So now I’m back where I was before. So my plan is to make another album, which will probably be a sad one. Then I want to make a surfing record.

So how did you get started in all this?

Surfing? Naw, you mean music. Well, I grew up playing music; both my grandparents were musicians, plus my parents were always playing Broadway stuff and show tunes. I started taking guitar lessons when I was 9; my first performance was in a carport for 60 people at a family gathering.

If not this, then what?

I’d probably be teaching swimming or surfing. I also do illustrations. Did you see my pie on the cover of the L. A. Times food section a few weeks ago?

So now, it’s tour, tour, tour?

Well, right now, it’s write, write, write. Then I’ll tour the country.

But there’s no waves in Kansas.

I can go up and down the West Coast.

Bill Locey, who writes regularly on rock ‘n’ roll, has survived the mosh pit and the local music scene for many years.

Details

* WHAT: Phranc

* WHEN: Sunday, 8 p.m.

* WHERE: Revival, 18 E. Ortega St., Santa Barbara

* COST: Fifteen big ones

* FYI: 730-7383