A Boy Needs a Dad : The Benefits of a Male Role Model Are Enormous, Says a Radio Executive Who Is Working Hard to Put <i> Father </i> Back into Father’s Day for Black Children.

I’m 7 years old and it’s the week before Father’s Day. I, like the rest of my classmates, am making the traditional construction-paper greeting card and clay ashtray for Father’s Day gifts. I’m working diligently to make them as perfectly as possible--but knowing all along that I won’t have a father to give these special gifts to. I found Father’s Day to be a day of emptiness and unfairness.

It’s very important for a child to have a father, especially a boy. Now don’t misunderstand me, mothers are very important and key to a boy’s development. However, my need to have a dad was great. I wanted someone to go to the park, the game, play catch with and just talk to me about his experiences, thus making them my experiences.

I remember visiting my friend’s home where there was a dad and wishing I could live in a complete family, just like in “Father Knows Best.” But I also remember the men in the neighborhood who also took time to talk to me, help me fix flat tires on my bike or play with me. I guess they knew I had a void in my life and they were trying to do their best to fill it. They became early role models and mentors.

For many African American boys, Father’s Day has no meaning because in their household there is no father or any other male role model. The young African American male existence is more fragile today than at any other time in modern history, due largely in part to their disenfranchisement within American society. As a result, our boys are joining gangs, dropping out of school, becoming criminals and fathering children without a sense of responsibility at alarming rates.

Now is the time for African American men to reach back and grab the hands of black boys and teach them what it is to be a man in our community. They need to learn about the dynamics of being a responsible husband, father, son and friend.

I know having a father makes a difference. I was 9 years old when my mother remarried, and my life changed for the better. Finally, I got the balance needed to better understand what I was experiencing as a young man. The education, guidance and discipline my father gave me along with the mentoring of other men have made the positive difference in my life.

That’s why I joined Black Men Reaching Back. What we try to do is fill a void in a boy’s life and be a role model, a mentor and a friend.

As I spend time with our young boys, I can’t help but reflect on the days I spent with my dad. I remember the many stories he told me, often more than once. No matter how many times I had heard them, I enjoyed them just the same. When I’m with the boys, I try to re-create that same experience for them.

When I sit back this Father’s Day, with my wife and daughter, I’m going to take a moment to reflect on past Father’s Days. I’m going to thank my dad with a prayer for the warm memories he gave me and a hope that I leave behind some special memories of my own.