Reaching Saturation on O.J. : THE JAUNDICED EYE

Lead me down every path of preposterous math

In the tax games, however off chancy.

Then I’ll watch film at 10 of the Newt’s purple wrath

Over each Clinton sin he can fancy.

I’ll scan every paper, tune in every station

For visions of woe that won’t go ‘way,

If media all grant my one supplication:

I don’t want to hear about O.J.

*

Oh, I beg to be spared as each new scrap is bared

And you newsies nose ‘round for some meaning.

I really don’t care that his 10 lawyers dare

Play the card of celebrity preening.

I’ll read other crime reports scrupulously,

Even horrors that make one say, “No way,”

If only you’ll honor this news blackout plea:

Nary one more hot word about O.J.

*

Refrain:

They can hire every lawyer with one speck of luster,

Examine with rage, cross-examine with bluster,

And run up a bill that would make Perot fluster,

Still I don’t want to hear--may your notes disappear!--

No, I don’t want to hear about O.J.

*

So stuff me with tales of a natural disaster

That swats hordes of humans like flies,

Famines and pogroms and wars that move faster

Propelled by parochial lies.

I pledge my attention to stalled intervention

Where Bill huffs and puffs yet has no say

And even the case for preventive detention,

At least of the news about O.J.

*

Refrain:

Ms. Clark may show up with unearthly-spiked hair,

Shapiro strip down to his socks on a dare,

The judge hand his gavel to Smokey The Bear,

Still I’ll plead overload. May your laptop explode

If I even read code about O.J.