TV REVIEWS : Returns Are Mixed for CBS’ ‘Women of House,’ ‘Rush’

The first of two CBS comedies debuting tonight, “Women of the House” is for those UFOs who just can’t get enough of Delta Burke as brazen, noisy--and don’t leave out grating--Suzanne Sugarbaker. If you think Speaker-designate Newt Gingrich is getting to be a load, picture his fellow Georgian Sugarbaker of “Designing Women” in Washington, filling the House seat of her late husband.

The second newcomer is speedy “Double Rush,” a very promising half-hour about a struggling New York bicycle messenger service, whose show-stealer is a dour, toy-sized, slow-moving 75-year-old messenger named the Kid who looks like a flasher in his long raincoat and walks like someone with Super Glue on the soles of his feet.

Burke’s fellow executive producers on “Women of the House” are her former “Designing Women” bosses, Linda Bloodworth-Thomason and Harry Thomason. Given the headline-making turmoil of their collaboration on that comedy, their reunion here is about like Bill Clinton jogging with Jesse Helms. But that’s show biz.

Although the producers themselves are tight with the White House and their double-length, hourlong premiere drops enough Capitol Hill names to buckle the beltway, they offer nothing here to improve TV’s mediocre record regarding political sitcoms. The setup is Suzanne’s arrival in town with her adopted small daughter, Desiree (Brittany Parkyn), her mentally disabled brother, Jim (Jonathan Banks), and enough politically incorrect tonnage (five former husbands, a black maid named Sapphire and a consuming interesting in the superficial) to give more conventional officeholders a hernia. Nevertheless, expect her honesty and earthy folk wisdom to prevail.

The opening hour introduces Teri Garr as a degenerate former Washington Post gossip columnist who becomes Suzanne’s press aid, Valerie Mahaffey as her prim homemaker-turned-receptionist and Patricia Heaton as her cynical chief of staff, Natalie Hollingsworth, who tries vainly to dissuade her jabbery new boss from a potentially lethal appearance on CNN’s “Crossfire.”

As the show spews stereotypes, Hollingsworth spews snydespeak , delivering barbs about Suzanne’s ample form (“This town hasn’t seen a pair of boobs like that since Haldeman and Ehrlichman”) and a press corps (is this pay-back time?) that earlier in Clinton’s term microscopically examined the President’s close alliance with fellow Arkansan Harry Thomason and his wife, Bloodworth-Thomason. Episode 2 extends that theme when Suzanne is warned about associating with “tan, happy people from Hollywood.”

Later, when getting to spend the night in the White House, bouncing Suzanne joyously turns Lincoln’s bed into her personal trampoline. Like much else in “Women of the House,” it collapses.

In contrast, there’s “Double Rush” from Joel Shukovsky and Diane English (“Murphy Brown”), another highly successful production team that likes to slip in political digs. But the title refers to the name of a messenger company, not Rush Limbaugh, and the producers are content with an occasional poison dart.

“I am a black man trying to support a family,” says one of the messengers tonight. “Bob Dole would call me a national treasure.”

Robert Pastorelli, familiar as Murphy Brown’s endearing house painter and confidante, heads an excellent ensemble cast in “Double Rush,” whose messenger-service ambience recalls some of the hum and hubbub of “Taxi.” Pastorelli is ponytailed owner Johnny Verona, a ‘60s-style idealist and former rock star wanna-be whose rejection tonight of a buyout offer from a larger, richer rival sparks the Great Messenger Wars.

Just when all appears lost, it’s the Kid (Phil Leeds), slow but graceful, who saves the day. He’s one of many off-beat amusing characters in this funny, fast-paced, eclectic farce that also features David Arquette, Sam Lloyd, Corinne Bohrer, D.L. Hughley and Adam Goldberg. A clever, street-smartness permeates “Double Rush,” whose initial episodes stall only when pausing to stiffly celebrate the big-hearted Johnny’s essential goodness. The emphasis on mush is unbecoming. Better these bikers should keep to the road.

* “Women of the House” premieres at 8 tonight with an hourlong debut. “Double Rush” follows at 9 p.m. on CBS (Channels 2 and 8).