The Wayans Ought to Give It a Rest

There’s a hit movie playing around the country called “Dumb and Dumber.” I’m not exactly sure what the movie is about, except I gather there are these two feckless goofs who are more ignorant than Forrest Gump and who manage to get themselves into one zany predicament after another.

There must be some kind of trend the bright boys and girls of Hollywood have stumbled on: the fool as the metaphor for the redemption of innocence in this age of compassionless conservatism.

Yeah, that’s it. There must have been this nobler purpose in mind when the executives at the new Warner Bros. Television Network heard the pitch for the Wayans brothers’ idea for a show. Or maybe the designer-water types were swayed by the symbolism of having a show that has the same initials as their network. Although in the case of “The Wayans Bros.” show (and for that matter the rest of the comedies that premiered Jan. 11 on the new syndicated channel) it must stand for the Without Brains Television Network.

Marlon and Shawn are the younger brothers of Keenen and Damon, and their show proves that comedy is not genetic. The basic premise of the sitcom is two brothers--one dimwitted and the other a schemer, and both would-be hustlers--who live in New York with their dad (played by the funny John Witherspoon), the owner of a diner.

On paper, that sounds all right. In the hands of bright, talented writers, that framework could provide an interesting underpinning to look at black male relations--even given that the show is supposed to be a comedy.

But what the Wayans brothers, the writers and producers did to the concept was a tragedy. The plot of show No. 1 has the stupid brother coming up with a homemade pomade for hair straightening. It’s a bargain-basement Jheri Kurl in a jar that they call, Goop! Hair It Is.

And the reason the slower brother is so obsessed with getting his hair conked has to do with him not getting into a club. It seems the doorman wouldn’t let him in, but two of his partners were admitted because their hair was greased up, their locks flying.

With that sound motivation intact, the rest of the episode deals with the brothers trying to find a celebrity to endorse their product on an infomercial for cable access. This includes putting a bag on Garrett Morris’ head and forcibly bringing him to their apartment. Now that’s supposed to be funny.

Anyway, Garrett bows out (after a joke is made about a real-life incident in which he was shot on an Inglewood street last year), and Gary Coleman becomes the spokesman for Goop! Hair It Is. There are other forgettable bits from the Wayans brothers, then finally the day arrives for their broadcast.

As one might suspect, the pomade ignites Coleman’s processed hair, and the end of the scene has a frantic Coleman crawling along the floor, trying to put the fire out on his head by rubbing it in the carpet.

And if you thought the first show was just working out the rough spots, check out these highlights from the second episode last week. In that installment, we have Marlon--the knucklehead--putting a sandwich to his mouth with his toes, having to strip naked to get through a metal detector, and telling a kid who has blown the brothers’ latest scam, “Boy, I’ll send you to Michael Jackson’s house.”

It’s bad enough blacks can’t get the lead in dramas, that we’re in the comedy ghetto of television. Must we then dig our hole deeper by acquiescing to do electronic minstrel shows? Even the old “Amos ‘n’ Andy” TV show wasn’t this demeaning to African Americans.

Give me ABC’s “Me and the Boys” any day. Steve Harvey, who plays the dad, is funny, provides insight, and the program displays positive relationships among black males. The creators of the Wayans’ show should watch a few episodes of Harvey’s show and maybe pick up a few tips. Better yet, why not pull the plug on the Wayans and the ones responsible for the fiasco, and bring back the thoughtful “Frank’s Place.”