Supervisors Keep Heads While Others Are Losing Theirs

Day by day, the post-bankruptcy survival strategy unfolds from the Hall of Administration. Backed to the wall, the supervisors are wielding their version of the neutron bomb, by which they eradicate people around them while, amazingly, leaving themselves standing. It’s the ultimate tactical nuclear weapon.

Depending on your view of human nature, you can either be angered at the supervisors or admire their chutzpah. County employees get lopped off right and left, bureaucrats fall by the wayside, but the supervisors remain.

And why? For the sole reason that nobody can fire them.

Is this a beautiful county or what?

I must be in a good mood today, because I’m just not in a sack-the-supes frame of mind. I really am more or less marveling at their ability to dispatch the people around them without falling on their swords themselves.

I suppose it’s a natural impulse to protect oneself, but wouldn’t you feel a little sheepish about costing other people their jobs while you’re doing it? The supervisors apparently rationalized that the ship was sinking, knew there was no way everyone was going to get off alive and decided to distribute the few life jackets among themselves.

For those of you who have lost count of those who have gone overboard, here’s a recap:

First was Robert L. Citron, the treasurer who, everyone took pains to note, was an elected official and, therefore, something of a solo agent. That pronouncement, of course, was followed quickly by Ernie Schneider going to Citron’s house and getting him to resign. So much for Citron’s independence.

Citron’s demise temporarily elevated the stock of up-and-coming Matthew Raabe, Citron’s assistant. Raabe was considered above the battle because he had threatened to resign over the portfolio’s shaky standing. When last seen, however, Raabe was put on administrative leave last weekend after refusing to answer questions over new disclosures about interest-payment diversions.

That brings us to back to Schneider, who did the board’s dirty work with Citron, only to find that he too would be taking an unplanned vacation. At present, Schneider is on two weeks’ paid leave, after the board demanded he resign, then retreated from firing him when he refused. Oh, the stories he could tell.

That takes care of the Citron-Raabe-Schneider cycle, but there’s been much more personnel maneuvering by the supervisors, who may come to be known as the Shuffle Board.

When it became clear last month that the board needed to make some tough decisions about layoffs, it named a three-man team. It picked three heavyweights from county government--Health Care Director Tom Uram, Dist. Atty. Michael R. Capizzi and Sheriff Brad Gates. This raised the improbable scenario of having heads of three major departments who annually fight for more budget money from the board now with enhanced authority to recommend cuts in others’ budgets.

And for added comic value (to me, at least), it leaves one of the board’s appointed saviors--Capizzi--in the position of rescuing the county from its fiscal irresponsibility while at the same time running the department that is looking into possible criminal violations stemming from it.

The newest shuffle step came this week when Uram was named to replace Schneider. The supervisors called that move temporary, but they hardly needed to tell us that.

Dizzying, isn’t it? And you thought Arkansas politics was incestuous.

All the feints and dips and twirling going on have created the impression of movement. It has created a sense that the board is on top of the situation and responding in a decisive manner. To be sure, no one looks more decisive than when they’re firing someone else.

We’re stuck with the current board--five like-minded individuals with a penchant for conservatism. Whether they’re up to the task they face is anyone’s guess.

In the meantime, wasn’t it Kipling who said, “If you can keep your head while all those around you are losing theirs, you’re an Orange County supervisor.”

Dana Parsons’ column appears Wednesday, Friday and Sunday. Readers may reach Parsons by writing to him at The Times Orange County Edition, 1375 Sunflower Ave., Costa Mesa, Calif. 92626, or calling (714) 966-7821.

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