At Last, ‘Cool’ Is Defined

As someone who usually strives to be as hip as possible, I broke out in a cold sweat last Saturday upon glancing at Calendar.

I’m referring, of course, to your lead article quoting several of my favorite alt-rockers as saying that Neil Diamond, Bert Bacharach and Tom Jones are now cool (“Mom, Dad, Can I Look at Your Old LPs?”). I had not known that.

As I rushed out to my neighborhood record store, saying a little prayer (that’s a pun, get it?) that it still stocked “Hot August Nights” and the “What’s New Pussycat?” soundtrack, it suddenly dawned on me what day it was: April 1!

Why you zany pranksters you! You certainly had this old “April Fool” going! I still haven’t wiped all that egg off my face! When I got home, I dusted off a stack of my favorite old REO Speedwagon and Styx discs, put ‘em on the stereo and cranked those suckers up. Now those guys were songwriters!

MICHAEL D. HARRIS

Tarzana