What We Need Is a Little More GOP Virility

S ay you made a mistake . . . don’t say, “She did it! She did it!” This is not what I would call virile Republicanism. It really isn’t manly, which I think (is) something men should still try to do.

--Former Republican Education Secretary William Bennett, reacting to Gov. Pete Wilson’s disclosure that hiring an illegal immigrant was all his ex-wife’s fault.

*

My sentiments exactly, Mr. Bennett. Certainly, what this post-Oklahoma City, pro-assault weapon, government-hating world needs is a little more Republican virility.

In honor of Bennett, today’s column is dedicated to the politically pusillanimous, the manly men manques and the Michael Huffingtons of this great if increasingly wimpy nation of ours. And because this is an equal-opportunity column, it is also dedicated to female Democratic gubernatorial candidates who blame their campaign strategists for embarrassing electoral losses, and female Democratic vice presidential candidates who claim not to know the details of their husband’s finances.

Rise up as one, my fellow Americans, and stop blaming other people for your own stupid and/or potentially indictable mistakes!

Barring that, get some fancy consultants and start spinning like there’s no tomorrow.

*

To lead the charge against illegal immigration--indeed, to carve out the issue as one’s own in an incipient presidential campaign--and then to have the issue come back and take a chunk out of one’s own posterior is an embarrassment no matter how you cut it. To the voters, Wilson’s quandary is either discomfiting or delightful, depending on which talk radio host they identify most closely with.

Regardless of ideology, what provokes widespread consternation is the way he has pinned blame for his troubles on his ex-wife.

Taking responsibility for one’s actions, though not widely practiced these days, is still something we preach as a virtue. Even as we dodge and dissemble and blame the other guy, other gal or our parents, we cling to the notion that personal responsibility is an important national trait, worthy of exhibition both in the home and at the office, particularly the elected office.

The Virile Republican, as I read Bennett, will take responsibility even if it means suffering the slings of his opponents. Once the Virile Republican stumbles into the Hypocrisy Zone, there is but one way out: Own up.

Can you imagine this from George Washington: “Father, I cannot tell a lie. That little girl who lives next door chopped down the cherry tree.” Or this sign on Democrat Harry Truman’s desk: “See that lady over there? That’s my wife. She’s where the buck stops.”

The Unvirile Republican, we may extrapolate, will hasten to change the subject. So when reporters asked Wilson whether this domestic development might compromise his anti-illegal immigrant stand, he replied, “I am not leading a fight against undocumented people. I am leading a fight against the federal government.”

Really now.

*

All of which raises some pressing questions about Wilson’s unfortunate revelation.

Why, for instance, does failing to pay Social Security taxes on an illegal immigrant knock at least two candidates for attorney general of the United States out of the running, but not a candidate for President? Isn’t a governor sworn to uphold the law, even one his wife has kept him in the dark about? Is ignorance of the law no excuse, except for politicians?

Certainly, the Tough-Talking Former Marine is not alone in ducking behind the skirts of his woman on this issue. Huffington reached new heights in the art of passing the buck while appearing not to, when, during his failed run at the Senate, he admitted breaking the law by hiring an undocumented worker.

“My wife, remember, was in charge,” he said. “I take responsibility, though, for anything. That’s the bottom line. . . . For anything that my wife may have done that has to do with illegal immigrants. I take full responsibility . . . because I am the husband.”

Faux manliness: a transparent ploy by the virility impaired.

When Bennett violated the now-obsolete 11th Commandment of politics (“Thou shall not criticize thy fellow Republicans”), he inadvertently gave us a 12th:

“Hide not behind thy Little Lady, nor even thy ex-Little Lady. Stand tall and take thy lumps, or be forever consigned to the wimp-heap of history.”

Or to the California governor’s mansion, anyway.