Crumbum Boss Could Be ‘Best’ of the Worst

And you thought your boss was bad? How about the guy who tosses everyone’s paycheck in the trash? Or the fellow who threatened to commit suicide and leave a note blaming his underlings for driving him to it?

For the third straight year, Jim Miller, an expert on managerial techniques, is mounting a national search for the creme de la crumbs of American management: the Worst Boss of 1995. Some of the early nominees are pretty crummy indeed.

“A compulsive liar,” complained one person, nominating her boss.

An accountant wrote of his boss, “All he knows is ridicule, blame, false accusations, humiliation, slander and verbal abuse.”

Other bosses are more honest, but not as bright.

“When my boss went to Disneyland, those of us who know him were concerned that he might be mistaken for Goofy,” offered one entrant.

The contest opened in April and runs through June 30. The person whose boss “wins” gets a weeklong Hawaiian vacation and $1,000 in spending money. All entries will be kept confidential, ensuring continued employment for the winner while he or she updates that Hresume.

Last year’s Worst Boss would tape crude pictures of fired employees on their vacant chairs, then mock the empty seats.

But lousy bosses aren’t always eccentric. Typically, they’re cheap. Foul-mouthed. Cheap. Heartless. Cheap. Nasty. And very often, cheap.

“Our paychecks are deposited for us--in the trash can!” wrote one entrant. “On payday, [the boss] marches into the kitchen, tells us we are trash, then throws our paychecks into the trash can.”

There are other indignities--the boss who insisted a veteran employee get a doctor’s note when his wife went into the hospital for lifesaving cancer surgery. The administrator who threatened to commit suicide and lay a guilt trip on his underlings.

Miller is also accepting entries for the country’s best boss. But based on the last two years--bad letters outpaced good by 4 to 1 in 1994--there’s a paucity of quality leaders.

There are plenty, however, like the boss one employee simply dubbed “Wildman.” Among his favorite tricks: making his assistant fire anybody who calls in sick.

Feeling better?

Entry forms are available by sending a self-addressed, stamped envelope to Corporate Coach Contest, P.O. Box 200907, Arlington, Tex. 76006.