Money Matters : Experts say the inability to manage assets effectively is a failing of millions of otherwise competent, knowledgeable and skillful American women.

In 1982, Carol McKeighan, 56, a medical secretary in Torrance, gave up her full-time job to care for her ailing mother in Minneapolis. For the next 12 years, she served as full-time caretaker, her meager income derived from savings and temporary office work.

Today, she is working full time again. Although she no longer cares for her mother, she said, “I’ve depleted my savings and I have not had any medical benefits or pension-sharing for years.”

Marilyn Steele of Fountain Valley was 40 when she was overcome by the fear that she might very well end up “growing old poor.” Steele, a teacher, had been through two failed marriages and had a teen-age son to raise when it occurred to her that she had not been putting money away toward retirement.

When Pati Longo’s husband retired from the Navy in 1975, she realized she knew nothing about their finances. “My husband was primarily the decision-maker,” said Longo, 67, who was a public relation’s consultant in Ventura at the time. “If I outlived him, I did not want to be left wondering.”

These three women have something in common: a need to take charge of their own finances. And they are hardly an anomaly. According to experts, the inability to effectively manage money is a failing of millions of otherwise competent, knowledgeable and skillful American women.

The National Center for Women and Retirement Research at New York’s Long Island University reports that many women are often one paycheck away from poverty and that they are financially uneducated.

Betty Berkeley, 69, a retirement planning consultant in Dallas, said married women are often the least prepared financially. “They often don’t concern themselves with their financial future because they think they will be taken care of the rest of their lives,” she said. “This is a big mistake because in three out of four marriages, the woman is the survivor.”

Longo, who several years ago took it upon herself to improve her “financial education,” believes that middle-aged and elderly women are most in need of financial help.

Longo has served for seven years as a spokeswoman for the Women’s Financial Information Program (WFIP), sponsored jointly by the American Assn. of Retired Persons in Ventura and Ventura College. “Traditionally, women over 55 are left behind when it comes to financial matters. They were socialized to marry--and to believe the husband when he said, ‘I’ll take care of it.’ ” Because of this, she added, “[Women] are not prepared when it comes to death, divorce, disability or desertion.”

The WFIP, started in 1988, offers workshops for women on how to take charge of their money. This year, seminars will be held in 800 locations throughout the country. In Ventura, about 500 women (ages 20 to 76) and their spouses have attended WFIP workshops since the program’s inception. The eight-week sessions are held each semester at Ventura College.

Although older women are most vulnerable when it comes to monetary matters, experts say it is never too early for women to get their finances in order.

Said Jeffrey Becker, a Los Angeles certified financial planner who conducts seminars on “Women and Investing”: “The sooner women prepare, the better. Some women are marrying later or choosing not to marry at all.” Of those who do marry, he said, 47% end up divorcing.

Steele, the teacher, sought the help of a financial planner. “If I am going to take care of my son, I am going to take care of myself first,” she explained. On the advice the planner, she has been salting away $300 a month for nine years into a tax-shelter account. “If it’s money you never see, you can learn to live without it.”

The group of women most at risk of financial ruin, most experts agree, are widows. “The average age of widowhood is now 56,” Becker said. The Long Island University study reported that “80% of women are left in financial jeopardy through widowhood.”

Marjorie Japngie, 68, of Fountain Hills, Ariz., is a case in point.

She was married for 36 years when her husband, Ed, died after a brief illness. Finances were a “reality shock,” she said.

“When you are dealing with death, you don’t know where to begin. You see the rope but you can’t find the threads to grasp. . . .”

After counseling with Howard Marchbanks, a district manager of Waddell and Reed Financial Services in Fullerton, Japngie is now on a strict financial budget. She has gotten rid of credit card debts, sold her automobile and rarely entertains or eats out.

“Women, who typically live longer,” Marchbanks said, “may have to stretch fewer dollars further. His suggestion is that they “try to set aside three to six months salary in an emergency fund--or simply set aside $100 per month.”

“If that’s impossible,” he said, “I would consider trading in your high-interest credit card for one with lower interest. Then, you can use the card in emergencies.” Marchbanks also warned women newly widowed or divorced to “avoid salesmen trying to push them into making immediate financial decisions.” Wait a year--or longer--”when you are least vulnerable,” he said.

For those women who are still happily ensconced in marital bliss and perhaps financial ignorance, Berkeley urges them to take charge. They can begin by finding out their net worth.

“Every family unit should be run on a businesslike basis with a layer of love,” she said. “Women also need to know where important documents are--insurance policies, deeds to their homes, their husband’s Social Security number, the title to their cars, and the marriage and birth certificates of both parties.”

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If the husband resists the idea of his wife’s knowing their financial status, Berkeley encourages the wife to go to the library and check out a book on money management so she can educate herself. “Then, when she approaches her husband, she can ask intelligent questions and begin to participate in important financial decisions.”

Longo agreed.

When she confronted her husband about their finances, she was surprised by her own lack of knowledge. “I didn’t know the amount of our insurance or our Navy benefits, where the will was located, or how long since we had updated our power of attorney.”

She now knows the answers to financial questions about budgeting, goal setting, how to buy insurance, caregiving expenses and how to locate important documents.

Longo’s husband, Charles, 69, no longer balks at her interest in finances. When he asks, “Why all the questions?” she replies, “Because I am getting older, and I realize one day, I may be here without you . . . and I don’t want to end up poor.”

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Some Facts About Women and Money

The following statistics on women and money were provided by the National Center for Women and Retirement Research, Long Island University, South Hampton Campus, South Hampton, N.Y.:

* The average age of widowhood is 56.

* 50% of working women do not have pension programs.

* Women are often one pay-check away from poverty.

* Nearly 75% of the elderly poor are women.

* 80% of women are left in financial jeopardy through widowhood.