LAGUNA HILLS : Hospital Wedding an Act of Love--for Father

Robert Cates is not afraid to die; he just didn’t want his time to come too soon.

For the past several months, the terminally ill cancer patient has been fiercely holding onto life, watching the calendar move slowly toward Nov. 11, his 37-year-old son’s wedding day.

But Cates suffered a relapse last month, and doctors told him that his life could now be counted by days.

So on Wednesday, Cates’ family brought the wedding to him, holding a traditional Jewish ceremony by his hospital bed at Saddleback Memorial Medical Center in Laguna Hills.

It wasn’t traditional in every sense, with nurses keeping one eye on the ceremony, the other on Cates’ heart monitor, and the couple posing for pictures in front of an emergency cart used to revive cardiac patients.

But it brought a sense of fulfillment to the hearts of Cates and the families of both bride and groom, turning what could have been a time of tragedy into a celebration.

“I wanted my father to be part of the ceremony,” said David Cates of Sherman Oaks. “It would have been very difficult on the day of the wedding if we hadn’t done this.”

Robert Cates, a 77-year-old Leisure World resident, lay quietly on the bed throughout the ceremony.

“Now I’m at peace with the world,” he said, a small smile crossing his gaunt face. “I always wanted to see my son get married to a wonderful girl, and now I have.”

His wife, Helen Cates, stood beaming at his side throughout the ceremony.

“This is the bravest man I know,” she said. “The last few months he has been fighting so hard to stay alive to see David get married. I can’t tell you how proud I am of him.”

David Cates and Linda Robbins, 37, also of Sherman Oaks, will be officially wed on Nov. 11.

Except for a few signatures on a marriage certificate to make it legal, the hospital ceremony was complete, with a cantor singing blessings to the couple and the traditional breaking of a glass.

“This was a small, intimate gathering,” as opposed to the large wedding next week, said David Cates. “This was for him.”