Community Essay : It’s Not the Children Who Need To Be Hit : There are proposals afoot to return corporal punishment to schools. A principal and a once-paddled student find no merit in the idea.

Are some schools in California out of control? Even if the answer is yes, will paddling restore order and discipline in those schools? I doubt it. A school that is out of control has gotten there because of a lack of leadership, not because of a lack of paddling. Look for a new principal; don’t hit the kids.

As a school principal, I cannot imagine myself paddling even the most challenging student in the most challenging situation. Am I a bleeding-heart liberal? Not at all. I support parents and respect their right to discipline their children as they see most appropriate. But the school relationship isn’t the same as the parent relationship.

Whittier School, my school, is Newport Mesa Unified School District’s largest elementary school with one of its poorest student populations. (The word “poor” does not seem to be politically correct these days. I see nothing wrong with it. Poor people know they are poor. Poor people have many lessons to teach those of us who are not poor.) Yet our students are well-mannered, show respect and know the teacher is the boss.

Many of our students live in a violent world: darting bullets and drug deals, living in extremely cramped homes, growing up without some basic necessities and, for some, living without much of a childhood. School is a place where peace needs to reign, where children must learn how to solve conflict and where respect always needs to be a two-way street.

School discipline isn’t rocket science and doesn’t require a tax hike. When children know what the rules are, that they are enforced consistently with logical consequences, and are supported by the parents, school works. In my nine years as a principal I have found that the greatest “punishment” I can impose on students is communicating that I am disappointed in them. I rarely raise my voice yet frequently need to hand out Kleenex to even the “big” boys, so I know my message made its way in.

The truly undisciplined child didn’t suddenly wake up that way. Those few irresponsible parents are in denial about their children’s lack of discipline, and rather than looking inward to their own lack of parenting skills are always looking for a place to throw the blame. Other parents know it, teachers know it and many times even the child knows it. Unfortunately, many teachers and principals are afraid to call irresponsible parents on the carpet because they usually fly into a tailspin. If anything, I wish the Legislature would give me permission to paddle the irresponsible parent; that’s an idea I might be able to live with.

I would never permit paddling in any school in which I was principal. That’s not the kind of relationship I want children to have with the adults at school.