By George, Williams Isn’t Coming Back

Dick Williams, who managed the Oakland Athletics to World Series championships in 1972 and 1973 and also put the 1967 Boston Red Sox and 1984 San Diego Padres in the World Series, is a special scout and consultant to New York Yankee owner George Steinbrenner.

With Steinbrenner’s affinity for firing managers, is Williams in the wings awaiting Joe Torre’s job? Absolutely not, he told David Falkner of The Sporting News.

“The game is just too different today,” Williams said. “Managers don’t run things, agents do. I’d last a week and then go off like a cannon and that would be the end of me.”

*

Trivia time: How many private schools west of the Rocky Mountains field Division I-A football teams?

*

Fashion note: Women officials and volunteers at the Atlanta Olympics will wear culottes instead of pants for their casual attire. Along with khaki, blue and teal polo shirts designed with giant Olympic rings.

*

The real test: Tennis star MaliVai Washington was signing autographs at a tournament when a 9-year-old boy named Trent told him, “I think me and my cousin could beat you.”

After 15 minutes of debate, Washington and the two kids took to a nearby court and settled it, Washington besting them in an hour-long, one-on-two match.

*

Phonics: When Austin Cameron of El Cajon entered a Formula 2000 race last weekend at Phoenix International Raceway, his hometown was listed as “Elka Hone, CA.”

*

Something different: After hearing so many players whine and gripe over losing games because of officiating, it was refreshing to hear what the Montreal Canadiens’ Vincent Damphousse had to say after his high-sticking penalty in overtime led to Washington’s 1-0 victory.

“I’ll take the blame for this loss. It was a bad penalty and very bad timing.”

*

For the home folks: From Timothy Dwyer of the Philadelphia Inquirer: “The Phillies are a bad baseball team with more old Cardinals than a retirement bird sanctuary.”

*

Electronic age: Even Boris Becker didn’t think his serve was that fast.

During the Australian Open, Becker’s serve was clocked at 480 mph. Timing officials quickly acknowledged something was wrong with their equipment on Becker’s serve.

Officially, the fastest men’s serve had been 135 mph by Britain’s Greg Rusedski.

*

Anything else? When pro golfer Brad Bryant went to teaching guru David Leadbetter looking for help, he came away scratching his head.

“David wanted me to change my takeaway, my backswing, my downswing and my follow-through,” Bryant said. “He said I could still play right-handed.”

The changes paid off when Bryant won for the first time in 18 years on tour.

*

On the fairway: Bob Hope, on playing golf with former President Gerald Ford:

“Whenever I play with him, I usually try to make it a foursome--Ford, me, a paramedic, and a faith healer.”

*

Trivia answer: Two, USC and Stanford.